Leadership

Announcing Mad Young Thing

2007-01-13T16:10:00.001+13:00

In 2007, I'm getting focussed and integrated. That means I'm writing around tighter topics of personal interest to myself. It means concentrating on work I can do well, and playing to my strengths.

It also means no more posts to Leadership Issues! I'm integrating my blogging activity into one, centralised blog: http://madyoungthing.blogspot.com/

Please join me, and enjoy a whole range of topics, ranging from the nature of reality, to the odd arty photo, to musings on storytelling, and of course the odd rant about leaders and what they do.

Although I won't be making any new posts, Leadership Issues will remain here on the web, so you can access the fascinating archives at any time.

Adios muchachos! See you at Mad Young Thing.

Update: see some posts on leadership, philosophy, world issues, management, economics, engagement and marketing.

Financial security vs. creativity

2006-11-29T21:38:00.000+13:00

"Financial security is the greatest inhibitor of creativity that mankind has ever known"

Jeff Lipsky, co-founder of October Films and director of Flannel Pyjamas, interviewed on KCRW's The Business.

The best workplace - your home office?

2006-11-27T19:51:00.000+13:00

An interesting observation on kiwi tech blogger Rod Drury's blog.

He quotes an article which says life inside Google may not be as cool as Google's image may suggest. The real fun - and wealth - may be to be had (is that grammatically correct??) in distributed workplaces.

He quotes Jason @ Loveplum saying:

The companies have put together [fewer than] 10 person teams that make products they love and so do their users. All while everyone involved makes a better than good living with a much higher overall quality of life (both at [home] and away from work)

...and then adds about NZ:

This is our sweet spot. We know how to do small teams well. We have lifestyle. We understand real business problems. Putting that model together with moderate funding is where our software industry should shine.

Not just software, but art, books, movies... just about anything. New Zealand - what an exciting place to live and work!

The best workplace - your home office?

2006-11-27T19:49:00.000+13:00

The companies have put together <>...and then adds about NZ:

This is our sweet spot. We know how to do small teams well. We have lifestyle. We understand real business problems. Putting that model together with moderate funding is where our software industry should shine.

Not just software, but art, books, movies... just about anything. New Zealand - what an exciting place to live and work!

Worldview

2006-11-23T10:30:00.000+13:00

Ever had a conversation that just wasn't right?

It's hard to put your finger on just what isn't right, but I think I've got it. Assumptions.

We all have a worldview, whether it's thought through or not. At the heart of each worldview are basic assumptions about life - assumptions which drive everything else further down our thought path.

So, when you're in a conversation talking about "things further down the thought path" it can be quite confusing if you're not aware of the other person's worldview assumptions. Or your own.

Lately I've been reading How Now Shall We Live, a fairly comprehensive introduction to the Christian world view. I've been a Christian for most of my life, but I often haven't thought deeply about the implications of that belief.

Obviously, I'm not relying on one book to tell me what I should believe because I'm a Christian. Instead, I'm using it as a thought starter, to really comb through my beliefs.

I believe it's a good exercise for everyone, whether you're an atheist, Muslim, kaballah-ist, or confirmed agnostic. It's not only good for you personally, it's a ticket to entry in a multicultural world.

If you're not now, you will be working with people of different world views. Instead of responding with fear or stereotypes, start by listening, and not assuming the assumptions of the other person.

It's a good place to start.

(end of useful bit, beginning of rant)

I find it ironic that in largely liberal New Zealand it's fashionable to characterise Christians - particularly American Christians - as intolerant bigots who can't handle diversity. The experience of a Christian in New Zealand is very different. If anything, Christians and other religious people have to examine their own beliefs, and adapt to the "real world" more carefully than do the majority of the population.

It bugs me when I hear people stereotype Christians while pretending to take the moral high ground by being - whatever they are. But I've realised the only way to deal with it is to ... hello, walk the talk, turn the other cheek, and get on with life!

(end of rant!)

Design

2006-11-21T12:16:00.000+13:00

Design is becoming a key component of management and leadership. So it's interesting to read this debate in Fast Company between the well-informed, sensible Joe Duffy and the elitist, old-fashioned Andrew Keen.

(As you can tell, I've picked sides on this debate!)

Semi review: Flags of our Fathers

2006-11-06T10:02:00.000+13:00

This is a semi-review because I'm only going to pick one tiny thing out of this story while ignoring the larger story.

In Flags of our Fathers the platoon sergeant Mike Strank is offered a promotion but turns it down because he promised that he personally would bring his men back home to their mothers. He knows it's a risky decision, and later pays for it with his life.

The stakes are a little lower in the corporate world today, but there still is the issue that promotion often involves taking someone out of what they do best, and into something they may not be best suited for.

It's an issue many people struggle with - are there answers to it? Does promotion always have to include moving further away from the front line? I don't know, but I'd be interested to find out.

What Great Managers Do

2006-11-04T10:07:00.000+13:00

A quote from a podcast I recently listened to from HBR's Ideacast:

"Great managers seek the right fit for a person's talent; they work to see he is rewarded for his performance and they endeavour to ensure his talent is developed through progressively more challenging and meaningful assignments."

NZ not really that innovative after all

2006-11-04T09:45:00.000+13:00

A study has come out that sort of shatters the myth about NZ being a world-leading innovator. Well, that's if the study is well done, which a leading academic doubts.

I wrote an article about it for Idealog magazine and you can read it here.

Review: The Devil Wears Prada

2006-10-31T06:10:00.000+13:00

Some people say it's a great movie if you're a teenage girl, but this bloke in his thirties really enjoyed The Devil Wears Prada.

It's a typical Faustian tale of temptation and the high price of success. Andrea (Anne Hathaway) takes on a job as PA to the fearsome fashion editor Miranda Priestley. At first it's just a job, until Andrea reaches a crisis point and must decide - will she fit in with her job's impossibly high fashion standards and cater to her boss's every whim, or will she quit? She's not a quitter, so she becomes part of the landscape.

It's a good film to watch and think about:

toxic working environments
abusive bosses
the close relationship between ambition, fear and no imagination
entrepreneurship as a necessary way out from the madness!
the importance of our small moral choices - they all add up to big choices

Of course, most of us won't face situations so dramatic as Andrea's situation, but it's a good moral exercise to put yourself in her Gucci shoes as you watch this entertaining comedy-drama.

Leadership resources you can watch again and again

2006-09-21T16:30:00.000+12:00

I've been watching Band of Brothers again, having never seen it in its entirety when it came on TV. It's compelling drama, and chock full of leadership lessons.

It's worth viewing again and again, if only to figure out who all the characters are! And when you do start to recognise distinct characters, you'll see how cleverly the whole series is put together.

Each episode focuses on one character's journey - my favourite is Crossroads, which shows Capt. Winters (above, played by Damian Lewis) dealing with his face-to-face confrontation with a young German soldier. As you get to know the characters, you see the foreshadowing of their journey in earlier episodes, such as Lynn "Buck" Compton's (played by Neal McDonough) slow but definite slide into post traumatic stress disorder.

Band of Brothers has obviously inspired many people since its release in 2001, as evidenced by the tributes and leadership resources around the place.

Just one word of warning, though. Watching three episodes in a row just before going to sleep is a bad idea, unless you want to be dreaming about death. The realism in this mini-series is superbly done. Because of that, it doesn't glorify war. It does glorify courage, and in the process makes us ask: how can I be courageous today?

Who says women aren't powerful?

2006-09-18T09:34:00.000+12:00

Whether you're a well-adjusted consumer, a brand slave or a foaming-at-the-mouth anti-corporate type, you can't deny the power of marketing and PR in today's world. Every day we're influenced by carefully-crafted messages from governments, major consumer brands, lobby groups and "the media".

So it's interesting to find that roles in those areas are largely made up of women. The latest survey from PRINZ (Public Relations Institute of New Zealand) shows 73% of PR professionals are women, and that's set to grow. A recent survey of New Zealand journalists shows a similar, if not so extreme, female skew. As for marketing, I don't know statistically, but I do know anecdotally, there are a lot of women out there.

Of course, it brings up the question, are these women really that influential, or are they merely doing the bidding of higher executives who are more often men?

Comment on civilisation from a dream guy

2006-09-18T08:00:00.000+12:00

"A civilisation based on comfort and convenience won't survive hard times. It will become brutal. A civilisation based on something deeper will produce people who are able to teach the survivors."

That's a paraphrase of an interesting comment by Rev. Jeremy Taylor, a specialist in dream projective work interviewed on Shrink Rap Radio. He was saying that our dreams can help us get in touch with the answers we need to very real problems in life, especially forming meaning out of suffering.

It's interesting listening, not just for the subject matter but to hear someone who really loves their job. Dr. Dave also shares some very valuable insights on staying fresh when you have to teach, present or deliver the same message over and over.

Hear the MP3 here.

What's better than feedback? Good feedback!

2006-09-14T11:16:00.000+12:00

Okay, so negative feedback can open the door to improvement. Sure. But sometimes it is such a buzz to get some positive feedback, and it inspires you to do better.

Marie and I have had a nice couple of weeks of positive feedback.

In a competition at Marie's work to garner good ideas, she won two MP3 players for the two ideas she submitted! (Her sister is very happy about the spare MP3 player)
Marie's second university assignment, an essay, got an A+!
I filed some stories late (a bad habit I'm working on!) and heard from two separate editors, "Thanks Simon, that story was worth the wait!"
One editor who hadn't liked my first filed story said, "Thanks for the way you turned that story around!"
I did a presentation at the Marketing Association's Practical Email Marketing yesterday, and afterwards one of the co-presenters of the day complimented me on my quiet, calm presentation style.

Great stuff, huh?

But I'm not just posting this stuff to brag. My point is to gather up as much positive feedback as you can and use it as propellant. There are plenty of challenges ahead if you're going to do something worthwhile. We need constructive criticism, yes, but we also need positive feedback that lets us know what we do well.

While I'm on the subject, I recently joined Trustcite, and if I've worked with you in the past, I'd welcome your feedback, positive or negative.

Company brand or personal brand?

2006-09-13T20:04:00.000+12:00

I just heard on the Duct Tape Marketing podcast that Robert Scoble, Microsoft's famous tech evangelist, has left Microsoft. The question for Microsoft now is, who can replace Scoble?

This is something that I've puzzled over - not Scoble specifically, but the increasing crossover between company and personal brands that happens with the current shift in marketing.

What current shift in marketing? (Which one?) I mean a general move towards high-touch, human-to-human contact. For example, Tom Peters' recent rant about tearing up scripts and letting individuals be individuals.

After all, people relate to people, not brands. For example:

A company spokesperson or character used in advertising (for example Goldstein for New Zealand's ASB Bank)
An editor of the company newsletter
A retail shop assistant
A travelling sales rep

The question becomes, who do people have the relationship with? The company or the individual?

In most cases I'd guess it's the individual. Which is great for the individuals, but what should companies do?

It's somewhat of a conundrum, and I can only think of one answer that's not really that helpful in the short term: hire really, really good people. People who like people.

Create an organisation that these people are excited about, glad to be part of, and then just let them be themselves. If you've got the environment and the people right, customer satisfaction should look after itself!

Leaders know contemporary culture

2006-09-07T22:31:00.000+12:00

This Blog Sits at the: Advent of an era? Corporate America finally gets contemporary culture?

Have you read this guy's blog? Witty, intelligent writing. It's a joy. Even when he has nothing to say he says it with panache.

Anyway, an interesting critique in the link above about why Tom Freston, former CEO of Viacom, is the former CEO of Viacom: he's out of touch with contemporary culture.

Reminds me why I started this blog: to garner the lessons in leadership, business and otherwise, from the everyday examples of pop culture around us. Primarily movies, because I watch a lot of them and want to make them some day. But yes, there's leadership in music as well, if you look.

I'd better start looking and listening! This is a call back to the roots of this blog.

Yes, another post about Steve Irwin

2006-09-07T21:59:00.000+12:00

I was going to, tongue-in-cheek, call this post "This Post Is Not About Steve Irwin". Then I was going to write the whole post basically about how Steve Irwin's death has been covered in the media all over the world, and how I wasn't going to be adding to the cacophony. It was going to be all very ironic.

But that's the trouble when someone who makes people laugh and feel great dies. You can only think of them in terms of fun, when this man's loss is so tragic to his family, friends and community.

But even though he's gone, he still encourages us. Tonight Marie and I talked as we often do about dreams and the future, about leaving the merely good in favour of the best. If there was ever anyone who truly let you know he was living his dream, 100%, it was that crocodile man, Steve Irwin. Rest in Peace.

I am officially amazed

2006-09-06T10:21:00.000+12:00

Maybe you will be too: The Future of Computing.

Can you figure out youth?

2006-09-05T13:12:00.000+12:00

I can't. I only just discovered I wasn't one any more (at least, I don't think so, although they say 40 is the new 30, so what does that make 31?)

Anyway, while I don't understand youth, I interviewed a whole bunch of people about youth marketing and wrote this month's cover story for NZ Marketing Magazine. You'll have to buy a dead-tree copy to read the article, but you can be teased a little by my teaser copy here.

Other people

2006-09-04T11:16:00.000+12:00

Some great links about working with others in this morning's email from Unlimited's Best Places to Work.

First, a Fast Company story about how having a best friend at work makes work more engaging.

When people leave an organization after a short time, they often talk about how they weren't able to connect with someone. On the flip side, there is something about those relationships that keeps people in jobs, too. We talked to a woman who was an executive at a nonprofit. She decided she was going to quit. That Sunday, her best friend from work called and talked about how much he valued her friendship. She ended up staying there several more years.

We crave connection; that's why MySpace, YouTube and Blogger exist.

The other story, from the Sydney Morning Herald, quotes research that shows we lose two hours of productive time each day because of technological and people annoyances.

Once your attention span is disrupted, it takes time to recouple yourself to your previous train of thought. If you are interrupted while trying to remember what it was you were meant to be doing, you might as well call it quits. The University of California study found that more than 20 per cent of interrupted tasks were not resumed the same day.

Holy crap. That's terrible.

While the first story makes me maybe wish I had a "normal" job, the second story gives me hope that - if I can stop distracting myself! - I'll be much more productive working here from home.

Constant innovation, constant disruption

2006-08-29T07:39:00.000+12:00

This article or rather the one it links to, says the increasing pace of change is normal in the new economy.

Quote:

"Innovation is disruption; constant innovation is perpetual disruption. ... [R]obust growth sustains itself by poising on the edge of constant chaos."

If this is true, then the skills of self-management become ever more important. Knowing and defining your own career path, whatever your role, is going to be a crucial success factor in coming years (in fact even now).

What does this mean, though, for those who struggle to get by? The people who genuinely can only cope with a day-to-day, 9-to-5 job? How can Unions and Employers help people in this new world?

The Open Hearted CEO

2006-08-28T09:24:00.000+12:00

I'm reading One Billion Customers, a book full of the harrowing cross-cultural misunderstandings that happen as Western companies try to do business with the most populous country in the world, China.

It's full of amazing characters on both sides who show the kind of leadership that's needed when reaching out to a completely different culture.

One such leader is - or rather was - Austin Koenen. He was arguably the most successful CEO of the embattled China International Capital Corporation (CICC), the first joint venture between a government-owned Chinese enterprise and a foreign company (Morgan Stanley).

One Billion Customers describes Koenen's approach:

"Chinese who worked with Koenen often used the same word to describe him: 'openhearted'. They meant they trusted his sincerity and believed that he genuinely cared about their careers and lives. Behaviour imperatives in Chinese culture are extremely negative and fairness isn't a hallmark of the society. Parents motivate their children by focusing on their faults and inadequacies. The government rules through control, shame, and a ubiquitous presence.

Worries about retribution for making mistakes guide the actions of most employees. Thus CICC's employees were extremely receptive to genuine kindness, sincerity and coaching from their new boss, whose competence was without question. For many, it was the first time in their lives that somebody in authority had treated them kindly."

Koenen also implemented systems and procedures to help the double-headed monster turn into a single entity, but his human kindness probably was his greatest heritage.

Sadly, Koenen died of a heart attack in 1998, and the CICC joint venture split up in 2002. Unfortunately, sometimes it an individual really does stand between success and failure.

Idealog hits the big time—from day one

2006-08-22T14:01:00.000+12:00

Idealog - Idealog hits the big time—from day one

It's so cool to be associated with a winner! Consider this bragging by default.

"Official figures released by the Audit Bureau of Circulation today show Idealog’s total New Zealand net circulation is 12,221. This is a great result. It puts Idealog almost on equal footing with the weekly newspaper National Business Review in circulation, and significantly ahead of all our major competitors,” says
co-publisher Martin Bell."

I'm glad that I ignored the little voice in my head that said there wasn't room for another Fast Company-style magazine in New Zealand. Sometimes the little voice is helpful; other times it's a damned pain.

Schadenfreude

2006-08-16T13:54:00.000+12:00

My mum was reading my article in the latest Idealog on bad design.

"It's interesting," she said, "but there's a long word I don't know."

Puzzled, I asked what it was. "Some sort of German word..."

Ah. Schadenfreude. "To take pleasure in someone else's misfortune." Quite unlike the Gemutlich stereotype of Germans.

Anyway the fact that she hadn't heard of that word made me worried. After telling so many for so long that they needed to make their language clear and understandable, have I become an elitist pig?

Then I remembered where I first discovered Schadenfreude (the word, anyway) - Lisa Simpson.

For the sake of clarity, avoid watching the Simpsons! It can really obfuscate your clarity!

(The above picture has nothing to do with this post)

The struggle for balance

2006-08-15T14:46:00.000+12:00

Writing words for a living can really take it out of you. Especially when it comes to relaxing.

Being a literarily inclined fellow, my leisure activities tend to consist of:

Reading
Watching movies
Listening to podcasts
Blogging!

Trouble is, those so-called leisure activities eat up just the same brain cells that my "day job" does - particularly when I'm trying to do two of them at a time (a frequent occurence).

So I'm not meaning to contradict my previous post on how noise bulks up your brain, but sometimes... after a few long work days and lots of interviewing... I just need a bit of:

music (instrumental)
walking and other exercise
cooking (although that's usually done while listening to a podcast!)
silent, reverent contemplation

That last one doesn't come naturally to me. I've only been developing the habit of shutting up for a while after going to a church that practices it in its worship services.

I remember sitting there at church one time contemplating the incredible light from a candle. I was thinking, "there's really good quality silence here".

Crazy, isn't it? As a culture we need specific places to go to enjoy what's always available - for physical exercise, we run on a treadmill inside a gym. For contemplation, we go to a purpose-built church.

Ah, it's not that crazy, really. Not when you consider the kind of world we live in now.

I was thinking about prayer in the business world the other day. If you're not religiously inclined, just imagine I'm talking about meditation.

The current "state of the world" demands we think of things in terms of currency (ie it's current, I don't mean money), scarcity and immediacy. That's why newscasts are so popular - and addictive.

During the recent war in Israel and Lebanon I've had news from so many sources - but when I analysed it, I wasn't getting a better understanding of it at all. I was picking up the raw emotions involved - and that wasn't helping me, or the situation in the Middle East.

So this week - simply because I feel I need it - I'm easing back on the information flow just a little, in that eternal search for balance.

Noise gives you a brain workout

2006-08-03T12:06:00.000+12:00

I wondered why I write my best writing in cafes and pubs. Turns out I'm giving my brain a workout, according to this interview with unorthodox USC professor Bart Kosko.

The more you can concentrate with background noise, the more it strengthens the brain. Isaac Asimov used to set his typewriter up in stores and other loud places to work. His claim was that you get really good at writing when you’re in a crowd. You want to be energized by that background noise, rather than distracted.

Exactly what happens to me. Most times. Other times, I can't even concentrate with just my music and the TV on, and I have to turn one off.

Just kidding. But the cafe thing is true.

And I thought I had deadline pressure...

2006-08-01T18:56:00.000+12:00

I just heard Condoleeza Rice on the news saying (and I'm paraphrasing here) that she hopes to get the fighting in Israel over by the end of the week.

Now that's pressure!

I've heard news reports that people are very unhappy with Rice's performance in the middle east last week, but I wonder what anyone can have done? These are big, big issues, and I'd love to be a fly on the wall, trying to understand just what it is that people think will change it. Chances are pretty high it comes down to personal influence - and leadership abilities.

Marketing Awards

2006-07-31T12:20:00.000+12:00

It was a real pleasure to be part of the Marketing Magazine Marketing Awards last Thursday. One of the best-organised events I've ever been to, and that salmon was delicious!

It was fantastic to be part of an event where success is really really celebrated. Marketing is a fairly niche industry, but even Marie (my wife), who isn't part of the industry, came away inspired to excellence.

Some food for thought from David Innes, who was inducted to the Marketing Hall of Fame: "Marketing in New Zealand needs to use less science and more creativity and entrepreneurship."

Sitting beside Sylvia and Keith from the Marketing Association (formerly the Direct Marketing Association, with quite a focus on database marketing and measurability) I really had to think before I applauded. Does too much science hamper us?

It surely can if we apply it the wrong way; but true scientific-mindedness, combined with intuitive understanding, can pave the way to an exciting future.

Leadership is as leadership does...

2006-07-25T15:37:00.001+12:00

I watched one of my all-time favourites Forrest Gump on the weekend, then downloaded a bunch of trailers for upcoming movies.

What a contrast!

Forrest Gump shows all the great virtues - courage, honesty, decency, simplicity - and it celebrates them.

All today's movies seem to do is celebrate cynicism, sexual experimentation, revenge, irreverence, and fear.

Sure, there's a place for all of those things in society ... but it seems the only great virtues you're getting on the silver screen these days is in kids' films like Cars.

Which makes me wonder, don't adults need the odd moral lesson or two? Or is Hollywood just jaded, not reflecting the hankering we have for some sort of moral framework to life.

Trouble is, when some people hear "moral framework" or similar, their worst image of religious fundamentalism comes up. Surely there's some middle ground, people?

Anyway, this post wasn't meant to be a beat-up on Hollywood. But it's true that movies affect every single person I talk to in my fragmented life - from my mate who works in a factory, to my wife's workmates in the call centre, to the senior managers and great thinkers I interview.

So, as leaders in whatever capacity, let's take responsibility for the things we take in. We've got a responsibility to be open-minded, yes. But we've also got the ability to choose what's good for us, and what's not.

For starters, I'd heartily recommend a dose of Forrest Gump!

A Mind of Its Own book review

2006-07-23T17:46:00.000+12:00

Continuing the theme of truth (not truthiness), yet another book on the subject came out last year, called A Mind of its Own: How Your Brain Distorts and Deceives.

A Mind of its Own covers similar ground to the first few chapters of Why Truth Matters, only in plain English. It looks at the question: how do we know the truth?

Unlike Why Truth Matters, this book doesn't dive into deep philosophical waters, but instead looks at research that shows us just how self-deluded us humans can be. We see how our brains massage the facts that come in, so we pay more attention to stuff that agrees with our prejudices, and play down anything that doesn't fit in.

In other words, it's very hard to be truly open-minded. And those who are often have a hard time of life, as the book points out:

"There is in fact a category of people who get unusually close to the truth about themselves and the world. Their self-perceptions are more balanced, they assign responsibility for success and failure more even-handedly, and their predictions for the future is more realistic. These people are living testimony to the dangers of self-knowledge. They are the clinically depressed."

As you can see, there's a healthy dose of humour in A Mind of its Own. But interestingly, there is no self-doubt - or depression - evident from the writer, Cordelia Fine. As a research fellow in the school of Philosophy and Bioethics at Monash University, she knows her stuff, and the book is littered with real-life examples of people she has met in her psychology career.

Plus she's married to a kiwi, so she has impeccable good taste.

Innovation closer than you think

2006-07-22T10:38:00.000+12:00

I actually posted something on my SimonYoungWriters blog! A very rare occurence, hence my posting of it here as well:

NZ businesses might be blinding themselves to key competitive issues. That's the message I've been getting from three entirely unrelated interviews recently.

Your competition is no longer the guy down the street, to paraphrase the discussions I've had with futurist Dr James Canton, Dr. Don Eigler, and Darryn Melrose, the new CEO of direct marketing agency AIM Proximity recently.

Instead, it could be the guy in a different country who serves your customers better than you. And you may never find out except by declining customer metrics... by your business slowly bleeding to death.

(Sorry, I'm in a dramatic mood)

That's the key take-out from these three interviews, all of which touched on the need to innovate and the need to get with it technologically. Specifically, the need for New Zealand to provide the broadband infrastructure we need, and the need for businesses to continually innovate for competitive advantage.

Innovation can be tiring. It can be a race. But innovative organisations also have a culture that provides the sense of adventure and discovery that people are looking for.

Go forth and innovate.

Truth

2006-07-20T11:45:00.000+12:00

There seems to be a lot of interest in the truth lately. Or at least a lot of books written on the subject.

Recently I finished The Truth About Lies; before that it was Seth Godin's All Marketers Are Liars , which looked at how the mind deceives its owner, and now Why Truth Matters, a real headache-maker.

There were some times I wondered "why am I reading this?" Passages like this one tended to blur the eyes and crease the forehead:

"Although Montaigne might have found the Pyrrhonist epoche a satisfactory response to the problem of the missing criterion of truth, Rene Descartes did not. In Discourse on Method, he tells how in his youth he had been haunted by the spectre of uncertainty..."

But as long as you're wide awake while reading it, Why Truth Matters yields some good insights. Or, at least, questions.

The whole first chapter asks, how do we know that what we perceive is reality? And why does it matter?

Lest this seem like a futile exercise in what Edward de Bono calls "mental masturbation", the last chapter (I cheated and skipped to it!) sums up the titular question/statement: why truth matters.

If you're really smart you'll see it on the back cover, which would save you the trouble of wading through the philosophical background to the question/statement!

On the back cover is written:

Truth matters because we are the only species we know of that has the ability to find it out.

Fascinating. A good book to get your brain thoroughly awake, and looking at the world you find yourself in.

Not bedtime reading!

A left-brained focus to life

2006-07-19T08:10:00.000+12:00

I don't know if this is something new, or something I've just noticed... but there is a strategy, goal and key performance indicators for everything these days!

KPIs have been part of business for at least 100 years, along with the mantras "you can't manage what you can't measure".

But as I look at self-help literature and popular psychology, I realise that KPIs are becoming just as useful - and important - in personal and family life.

Take programmes like Supernanny, Demons to Darlings and The House of Tiny Tearaways. Parents are discovering what is, in essence, good management practice: set realistic, meaningful KPIs, measure them, and reward compliance consistently.

It's not rocket science. But it is science.

So why do we need this? Because we live in a pluralistic society, where truth is relative and instead of a unified ideal, you get to pick whichever ideal you prefer.

Trouble is, most people don't know where to start. People - all of us - are crying out for structure, for absolutes. Even those who argue against absolutism do so in absolute terms. We want - we need - rules, boundaries and common definitions.

What to do with that? I don't really know. I'm bucking the trend by not giving you 10 things you should do! :)

The Leadership Issue in today's Herald

2006-07-17T10:37:00.000+12:00

This blog is all about leadership issues, but there's just one Leadership Issue in today's New Zealand Herald.

While it doesn't have my quasi-regular marketing column, The Leadership Issue of The Business does have some very good stuff on what makes a leader. Articles by luminaries whose names I have seen writing and speaking on the subject for years, people who have put their money where their mouths are.

The Business doesn't appear to be available online, so perhaps it's a good opportunity to go kill some trees, and some time, with a coffee and a paper.

Shrink Rap Radio

2006-07-14T10:59:00.000+12:00

When Marie started studying psychology, I - ever ready to overwhelm with information - started looking for podcasts on Psychology.

There were a few universities offering podcasts of lectures, but nothing beat the fun-spiritedness of Shrink Rap Radio. Even the tagline "all the psychology you need to know... and just enough to make you dangerous" struck a chord with me!

What I really enjoy about it is the sheer variety of stuff that gets covered. And while I don't agree with all of it, it's not about agreeing, it's about joint exploration of ideas and themes.

Not only that, Dr. Dave talks with people from all walks of life who use psychology in their jobs - from cops to market researchers to blokes in an Aussie pub.

So consider this an old-fashioned, simple plug: go listen to Shrink Rap Radio. You'll enjoy it!

"We are monitoring your thoughts"

2006-07-13T22:49:00.000+12:00

A "thought-monitoring form" sounds like something from the novel 1984, but it's actually a really helpful component of Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, as explained in Change Your Thinking.

Often we are knocked around by thoughts and feelings that are buried deep within us. Because we don't recognise them, they control us. When we can bring them into the light, we're able to challenge these thoughts - or cognitions - because we see them for what they are.

The thought monitoring form is a simple form to use whenever you face anxiety, stress or any negative feeling. Here's the basic format, from page 38 of Change Your Thinking:

Situation:

Feelings:

Thoughts:

Beliefs:

Thinking Errors (there's a whole list of common errors with a tickbox next to them)

Dispute:
Alternative, more balanced view?

What would I tell a friend who was in this situation?

Positive Actions:

The form is supposed to take you on a journey from helplessness to positive action, starting at the obvious (the situation and how you feel about it) through to what lies behind our reactions (thoughts, beliefs, thinking errors).

Asking questions like "what would I advise a friend to do?" helps us get beyond the double standard we often apply to ourselves - we see ourselves as worse or harder to deal with than other people.

This is also the stage where Socratic (or Sock-ratic) questioning comes in helpful too.

And finally, taking action - or at least identifying what action you can take - is incredibly liberating. It puts the ball back in your court; you can focus on the things you can change rather than those you can't.

More gems from Change Your Thinking

2006-07-13T22:14:00.000+12:00

...and then I'm onto another book, honest!

On page 159 of the 275-page book, it picks up a common mistake in life and relationships:

Don't confuse the things you did with the person you are. You are much, much more than just a few behaviours.

Sounds so simple, yet how many of us have allowed ourselves to be branded - by others, or by ourselves - based on one mistake. Or alternatively, on one success?

For example (from the book):

Vicki unthinkingly passed on some information that was told to her in confidence, which unfortunately got back to her original source. Her friend is furious with her for 'shooting her mouth off', and Vicki is beside herself with shame and remorse. She tells herself that she is a traitor and a heel and should never be trusted again.

What we do is so different from who we are.

Here's another example that isn't based on a mistake, but just on everyday behaviour. I strongly relate to this one (although less so these days).

Kim feels like the odd one out at the advertising agency where she works. Although she has been there for almost a year, Kim doesn't feel particularly close to the other members of her team. The other people have different values and interests to her own, and Kim regards much of the conversation to be pretty superficial and banal. Most of the staff seem to get on well with each other, and at times Kim wonders if there's something wrong with her. She labels herself as an outsider.

The book then goes on to describe Kim's thought-monitoring form, a very helpful device, which helps her arrive at this conclusion:

"I connect well with some people and not with others. There is no reason why I should connect well with everyone. I got on well with the staff at my last job- people are all different. It would be nice to feel closer to the staff, but it's OK if I don't. That doesn't make me inferior or inadequate. It's OK for me to be who I am - I don't need to be anyone different."

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy is about reframing reality in a healthy way. It's about saying "this is true, yes, BUT..."

More on the thought monitoring form tomorrow.

Strong Men With a Tear in Their Eyes

2006-07-11T15:03:00.000+12:00

It's OK for blokes to cry - but blubbing is strictly for the girls - 10 Jul 2006 - World News

Fascinating stuff! Turns out perceptions of men crying have changed, and there are three rules for crying that will get you the respect and admiration of your peers:

1. Cry about something if it's important
2. Don't blub. Just have a moist eye. It shows "the intensity of tears but also shows you are in control of yourself."
3. Be male. This is kind of hard to do if you're not!

But it's good news for me. I have very sensitive eyes and even when I'm not deeply moved a brisk walk in the cold weather can make me all teary. I just need to find some important things to appear to be crying about, and I'll appear, according to this, "a strong, powerful man."

Brings a tear to your eye.

Does your organisation need an "experience manager"?

2006-07-11T15:02:00.000+12:00

I read in the latest Business to Business that Auckland Airport has appointed Lucy Thomas as its passenger experience manager. What a fantastic role!

The article says "she will develop and champion the visitor experience at Auckland Airport". And there's also a strong research component to her role, which is handy because she used to work at TNS as a senior qualitative researcher.

Great example of innovation, and hopefully one that will pay off for Auckland Airport.

Highly capable people

2006-07-10T11:18:00.000+12:00

In the latest Management Magazine there's an interview with Daniel Di Filippo, PricewaterhouseCooper's "global leader of performance improvement", on the results of a survey of 1410 CEOs from around the world.

The survey looked at the increase of complexity in the role of a CEO, and what those CEOs believe can help them deal with that complexity.

Number one in the toolbox of capabilities to deal with complexity: having highly capable people. However, while they recognise that's what they need, good people are apparently hard to find.

It was kind of encouraging to me, particularly around this blog. There's a great need for individuals to be working at their full potential, whether they are entrepreneurs, visionary leaders or at any level of an organisation.

More on "head-to-head" learning

2006-07-07T11:38:00.000+12:00

After trying to get a grip on the Iraq war, I thought I'd go further into dialectical debate as a way of understanding an issue.

Actually, that's not true. I just happened to get Plato's Republic: A Biography, and found that Plato's Republic is actually a set of dialogues, a common way to present philosophical arguments.

I was looking forward to a... well, a biography! A story with a beginning, a middle and an end. That's what was promised.

Instead, I'm getting a truncated commentary of the whole thing. That's the trouble with philosophers, they're not journalists. When a reader like me, who's new to the topic, needs a simple covering of the who what when where how why... in laymen's terms ... it's a bit disappointing to get the author arguing with the text almost before the story has started.

Having said that, if I'm in full "over-my-head" learning mode, I can get what's going on and, hopefully, understand the ideas behind Plato's Republic.

Having said all that, I'm three chapters in, so this book may well prove to be a bit better as time goes on.

Here's hoping!

Sock-ratic Questioning

2006-07-05T07:49:00.000+12:00

In the book Change Your Thinking, author Sarah Edelman talks about how helpful the practice of Socratic questioning is to challenge our unfounded fears or "negative cognitions".

She says,

"Socratic questioning can be a useful tool for addressing biased thoughts because it helps us objectively evaluate our cognitions and challenge catastrophic predictions."

Next time you're worried, here are some questions Edelman suggests asking yourself:

Describe the situation you're worried about
What specifically do you fear might happen?
Rate the likelihood that this will happen (from 0 to 100%)
What evidence supports your worrying thoughts?
What evidence does not support them?
If it did happen, what actions could you take?
Realistically, what is the worst thing that could happen?
What is the best thing that can happen?
What is most likely to happen?
Are there any useful actions you can take now?
What would you tell a friend who was in your situation?
Realistically, re-rate the likelihood that your fears will be realised (from 0 to 100%).

Questioning yourself along these lines is really great for regaining control of your circumstances.

A variation on Socratic questioning

A few weeks ago my dear wife Marie was in a big tizz. (I know I shouldn't tell tales, but this is for the greater good... right?)

It was a familiar topic of worry - how to fit in the time needed studying with housework, family time and personal time. Because I have an aversion to repeating myself, I didn't really want to say much. But someone needed to help Marie get unfrazzled.

It just happened we'd spoken earlier that day about how puppet shows reach both children and adults on a level that ordinary conversation couldn't.

So... out came Ed the sock puppet - a complete stranger, who had a very caring manner about him.

Ed asked Marie what was wrong, why she was upset. Because Ed was new to the situation, Marie had to explain it from scratch - gaining some perspective in the process.

And besides, you can be mad at your spouse, but who can be mad at such a friendly sock puppet?

So next time you or your better half start to get crinkly around the edge, head to the sock drawer!

Ed says it works.

Head-to-Head Learning

2006-07-04T11:18:00.000+12:00

Yesterday I wrote about over-your-head learning, and said that can only get you so far.

One way to go further is head-to-head learning.

In a nutshell, it's hearing both sides of an argument fully before arriving at a conclusion. Not so revolutionary, but there seems to be a dearth of it in a soundbite-driven cultue.

"What do you think of the war?"

Last year, Sandra asked what I thought of the war in Iraq.

I had to admit I had very little clue, because I have very little real knowledge of the real situation.

Instead, I've got what I guess most people have - sound bite arguments for and against.

For:

Saddam was a bad man who killed many people.
The world is safer now he's not there.
What if the US had not gone to war in World War II?

Against:

War is bad because people get killed.
There were no Weapons of Mass Destruction.
George Bush is stupid, evil and goofy.

Hardly intelligent arguments, although it's a very good point that there were no Weapons of Mass Destruction.

Anyway, I thought I'd best get some in-depth education, so I read two books, one for each side of the argument.

For the War

The Case For Democracy: The Power of Freedom to Overcome Tyranny and Terror isn't exactly about the war in Iraq, but it does champion America's role to build and encourage free societies around the world.

It's written by Natan Sharansky, a former Israeli cabinet minister and, before that, a refusenik dissident in the Soviet Union who was imprisoned and tortured under that regime. He speaks with great passion about the difference between a free society, like America, where you can express your dissenting opinion freely, and a "fear society" like Iraq under Hussein, where dissent voices are muted, imprisoned or killed.

Against the War

Failed States : The Abuse of Power and the Assault on Democracy points a big, accusing finger at the United States for failing just about every aspect of its mission to uphold democracy, not only around the world but also at home.

Its author, Noam Chomsky, is an outspoken critic of US Foreign Policy. I'd heard of him previously in the documentary The Corporation, and also by him being described as dangerous by, I believe, the National Business Review.

He's used to being disagreed with, apparently, and his book is extensively footnoted with research into the sometimes quite shocking accusations he's making against America - interestingly, not just the George W Bush regime, but against American foreign policy dating back to 1819!

Unexpected Harmony
I'm using these books as examples of head-to-head learning, assuming that they're diametrically opposed. They are in terms of their conclusions about the US occupation of Iraq, but in terms of base ideas they harmonise remarkably. Both books agree that a genuinely free, democratic society is the most desirable way to achieve national prosperity and global security today.

My Take
So what am I to make of this head-to-head learning??

I'm definitely against a war waged on the basis of a lie. In that respect I take Chomsky's side. But I disagree with him that the longer America stays in Iraq, the more dangerous it is for America and the world. If America is actually helping the fledgling Iraqi government achieve and maintain control of their own backyard, let's not get them out until they're finished doing that job.

Of course, this is not my set-in-concrete position. Opinions based on current affairs must always be subject to what happens in those current affairs.

Happy Independence Day
Whoever's right, Chomsky or Sharansky, it highlights the importance of the democratic values that the Revolutionaries fought for 230 years ago. If you're reading this in the USA, may I wish you a heartfelt happy fourth of July!

Over-Your-Head Learning

2006-07-03T13:38:00.000+12:00

"Crash course" - what images come up in your mind when you hear that phrase?

I ask because I recently realised that's how I've done most of my learning.

It kind of works. Kind of. Sooner or later you need to take a measured approach.

But to kick off the mind's metabolism and make you hungry for knowledge, there's nothing quite like over-your-head learning.

Here's how it works:

What do you want to learn? It may be an industry you need to get familiar with very quickly ... for me it was healthcare when I did some work for a cord-blood bank. Or, on a more personal note, the filmmaking industry.
Dive in. Find industry specific websites, read industry magazines, attend networking events just to watch, listen and learn. The important thing is to shut up and learn. Don't let your existing inklings get in the way in this initial stage. Suck in the new information like a vaccuum. Even when you don't understand it, which will be often.
Pull back and assess. You probably have a whole heap of knowledge that doesn't yet make sense. Put it all out in front of you, metaphorically or physically. Start observing connections. Now's the time to start asking questions. Find people you trust, who don't look down on dilettantes or beginners, and who can give you straight, simple answers.

By the end of these three steps, you'll be surprised how much you actually know, particularly when you rub shoulders with those who have been educated the "proper" way.

As I disclaimed earlier, this won't get you all the way to where you want to be. But if you find you need to start somewhere, and that somewhere isn't the conventional "way in"... why not give it a try?

Back with the Mac

2006-07-02T15:04:00.000+12:00

Welcome back. It's been a long time since I last posted here, but I have good reasons!

Main one is, I'm now a Mac user. Yes, the week before last - on my 31st birthday, in fact - I upgraded to a MacBook Pro. As anyone who's made the PC-Mac transition knows, there's a steep learning curve, and it's a little tricky to handle when there's lots of work on at the same time too.

However, I'm here, safe and sane. I think. Coming up in the next few days, an examination of learning styles. Nothing too academic, just my own observations of how I learn. I hope it's helpful.

The Brain of a Leader?

2006-06-19T07:49:00.000+12:00

Read: idealawg: Leadership: It is as easy as brain surgery

Sounds very interesting, particularly the conclusions from the article it links to, like:

• Behaviorism doesn’t work. Change efforts based on incentive and threat (the carrot and the stick) rarely succeed in the long run.

• Humanism is overrated. In practice, the conventional empathic approach of connection and persuasion doesn’t sufficiently engage people.

• Focus is power. The act of paying attention creates chemical and physical changes in the brain.

All based on research, and worth a further read.

The Power of Personalisation

2006-06-06T18:31:00.000+12:00

We hear about totalitarian regimes and it kind of washes over us. But when a story like Save Nazanin comes to our attention, it's impossible to ignore.

Nazanin is an 18 year old girl facing severe consequences for killing a man in self-defence. The site features a photo of her so we know this is a person, not a statistic or some faceless foreigner.

The original penalty was death; thankfully, that has now been overturned. But she still faces severe difficulties. This is an opportunity for the blogosphere to show some leadership - some people power.

This post is my tiny attempt to help Nazanin. Visit the site to find out how you can help.

(Thanks to Juha for alerting me to this on his blog)

Whole Messages

2006-06-06T12:04:00.000+12:00

How many times have you wanted to say something but not had the nerve to say it? Or worse still, it came out in the wrong way, or at the wrong place, or at the wrong time ... or all three!

Change Your Thinking has a fantastic chapter on communication, something we all need to do every day. This chapter is so vital that I've actually summed it up on one page and stuck it on my wall.

Part of this chapter is about whole messages: messages to help us get our message across and avoid alienating others.

Here's what a whole message looks like:

Observation: I noticed you've been drinking more often than usual lately.
Thoughts: I don't think it's that healthy for you.
Feelings: I'm worried for your health.
Needs: I'd like to find out if anything's troubling you, and if you're okay.

Of course, some of these messages will be difficult to deliver, so a simple preliminary statement can help, saying you're uncomfortable saying these things. If the other person knows you're uncomfortable, they're likely to feel less threatened.

What do you think about these guidelines? Perhaps, like me, you initially reacted against the idea of rules or a framework around relationships.

But as I thought about it, and about uncomfortable situations I've been in, it made more and more sense. This type of information is very valuable.

Work it out with a paper clip

2006-06-01T13:40:00.000+12:00

A lot of Change Your Thinking is either common sense, or stuff I've already heard on Doctor Phil.

That's not to say it's not worth reading - it's absolutely fantastic to be reminded of common-sense stuff that's not really that common.

And sometimes there's a completely new gem from out of the blue, like this:

An exercise I occasionally do in my workshops is to ask participants to come up with fifty possible uses for a paper clip. Sounds impossible at first, but when I reassure people that our record is 102, the creative juices start to flow ... When we believe that solutions exist, we are much more willing to look for them and, as a result we are much more likely to find them.

Love it.

Was going to try procrastination, but put it off...

2006-05-25T12:19:00.000+12:00

Oh how I wish that headline were true of me... Sadly I have nearly perfected procrastination.

Last week, particularly, I was supremely proficient at wasting time. I spent what must have been two working days tweaking my desktop with Yahoo! Widgets.

But here's the irony ... I was looking for widgets that would help me track my time.

So this week, I've got the tools to stop procrastinating ... namely:

a clock (or 4 ... I went a little overboard) that chimes every quarter hour. Amazing how time goes!
A billable hours thingy ... so I can see how much or how little I'm earning each day. That's a powerful motivator!
A "due" list that lists my jobs, and in how many days they're due.

It's all good, folks. And today on my third day of this new regime, the withdrawal symptoms from procrastination are starting to get bearable... just.

But hey, there are also widgets that show you the inside of hairdressing salons around the world... or the current azimuth of the moon ... or when the next solar eclipse is... approach widgets with care!

Expertise (Or, why you are one of the chosen few)

2006-05-24T15:12:00.000+12:00

The reason there aren't thousands of people flocking to this blog is ... I'm not an expert.

I realised this a short time ago, and decided I don't want to be an expert. Not quite yet.

Of course, in the old days, one couldn't be an expert unless one actually knew and could demonstrate knowledge of one's expertise. But in this world of soundbites, it's how you position yourself, perhaps more than what you say, that qualifies you as an expert.

This is not sour grapes because I'm not getting blog traffic ... it's just an observation of my own blog-reading habits. There's a lot of information out there, and before long I have to prioritise what I view.

At the moment my rough, hitherto unwritten categories, are:

I know this person personally (that sounds very silly when you say it out loud)
I have read an insightful book by this author
This is a recognised news source (eg existing media)
This blog is recognised by one of the above 3.

Most of those, you've got to say, are based on some sort of expertise. Expertise is like a shortcut. And, as a recent post by Jack shows, sometimes it's the wrong shortcut!

So if I'm not an expert, what am I? Well, I've been an expert in the past, and hope to be again in the future. But for the meantime, I'd like to think of myself as an explorer, wide eyed with wonder.

So if you're reading this, and you must be, thanks for exploring with me.

Leadership lessons from Wedding Crashers??

2006-05-23T06:10:00.000+12:00

What could these guys possibly teach us about leadership?

Well, some of those rules - like rule #84 - could possibly come in useful.

But the real gold from Wedding Crashers came from the special features.

Director David Dobkin knows how to keep people motivated. Every day, he would pin a storyboard of the day's shooting in a prominent place, so everyone - cast, crew, extras, everyone - could see it. When each scene was shot, he'd get a quick screen capture of the scene and paste that over the hand-drawn storyboard. People could see in real time how progress was going. So everybody was part of the project.

And the end product is one of the funniest films I've seen recently. Nice work, David Dobkin!

What Happened to Your Parachute?

2006-05-18T13:10:00.000+12:00

What Happened to Your Parachute?

An article from Fast Company. More a conversation, actually, between Daniel Pink (Free Agent Nation, A Whole New Mind) and Richard Bolles (What Colour is Your Parachute?).

If you're interested in career trends, this is like, I don't know, Bono interviewing Bob Dylan or something!

I smiled at this part:

DP: ...are there any other cherished myths you'd like to explode? Aren't we all free agents? Should companies not be fast?
RB: As I said previously, I have no problem with people noticing and talking about all the changes that have occurred. But I'd like them to talk about the constants, too. Yes, a lot more of us are free agents. And yes, a lot more companies are fast. But not everybody's become a free agent -- and not every company has become fast. We mustn't overdramatize our present time, as though everything is change, change, change. My wife, Carol, has a great saying about marriage: "You shouldn't have to work at your marriage. But you do have to pay attention." Many changes in the workplace aren't so dramatic that you have to work at them. But you do have to pay attention.

That, and more, in the full article.

Logic and Emotion

2006-05-12T15:03:00.000+12:00

The fictional character of Mr. Spock allowed many Star Trek fans to explore their own relationship with logic and emotion.

In Spock's Vulcan mindset, it was an either/or proposition: either logic or emotion.

But in Change Your Thinking, the book on Cognitive Behaviour Therapy I'm reading, logic leads not to an impassive life, but instead a very happy, fulfilled life.

Simply put, CBT helps you figure out what messages you're running on, and, if they're unhelpful, to change those messages. Bring them in line with reality.

For instance, some people - myself included - can be really hard on themselves in social situations for saying what they perceive to be stupid or inappropriate things.

So instead of looking back on, say, a networking event with happiness, I'll do a self-critical postmortem on what I should've said, shouldn't have said, etc. etc.

CBT gives me a framework to 1) identify what I'm thinking, which can be quite a big step, and 2) dispute that belief using... logic!

So, Mr. Spock ... sure, you had problems with your old man and you could never tell your Mom you loved her... but with CBT, you will be able to finally say, "I feel fine." (If you haven't seen Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, that won't make much sense)

Simon's new online marketing column

2006-05-11T21:05:00.000+12:00

Head over to Marketing Magazine
to see my latest (and first ever!) online marketing column. It's there on the table of contents under "Online Marketing".

Nice is not enough

2006-05-08T21:56:00.000+12:00

Finally - a little inspiration from Denmark! Thanks SY for keeping the blog rolling.

One of my favourite movies of all time is "Fight Club" with Brad Pitt, and people are often surprised when I tell them this. Actually, it surprises me too - for many years, I wouldn't even consider watching a movie with a name like that - I thought it would be far too violent and shocking for me, and not in the mood of my other choices.

But, finally, I watched it a couple of years ago, and loved it. I watched it again last week, and loved it even more - second time around, it struck me as being surprisingly funny, in the same black way as "Pulp Fiction", and it also makes some provocative comments about the way our consumerist world leaves us feeling emptier than ever.

My favourite scene, the one I find myself always thinking about is one where Brad Pitt comes across a guy who's washing dishes for a living. Brad Pitt puts a gun to the guy's head, and while the guy is on his knees, terrified for his life, asks him what he wanted to do when he was a young man. In between his panic-stricken breaths, the guy responds that he had wanted to be a vet. Brad Pitt takes the man's driving license, and tells him that he has "six weeks". If after that time, he isn't on the road to becoming a vet, Brad Pitt warns, he will kill him.

After the man has run off, Brad Pitt's cohort, played by Ed Norton, tells Brad Pitt how shocked he is by his actions. Brad Pitt turns to him and says: "Think how sweet tomorrow morning will be for that young man."

Truly a tough scene, but one that stays in my mind as a reminder that sometimes it's not enough to be nice. There are times when we need to be tough, to take difficult actions, or to say difficult things to people in our lives, or to be direct, and for many of us, this is very uncomfortable.

Knowing the problem is part of the solution

2006-05-08T09:24:00.000+12:00

Some fantastic advice here from Hollywood script coach Skip Press:

"If you know what the real problem is, you'll know
instantly what to do, and you won't have the problem long. People who
constantly whine about this or that, blaming someone else, another
group of people, a politcal party, a President, or "Hollywood" aren't
really getting at the solution, they're just complaining about
symptoms and they haven't looked deep enough yet to find the real
root of the problem, so that it can be handled."

I'm on Skip's YahooGroup, Hollywoodwriters. He's a guy who's not afraid to share his own personal experiences to help others. There's no personal-professional line here, it's whole people helping whole people. I think more and more of business is going to get like that as we go on.

Here's the full message, republished with Skip's permission:

"This is a post about people but it's also about scripts. And it's
also about me, so if you get offended about that and think I talk
about my own life too much, just leave the group, because I've lost
my tolerance for being "thoughtful" (meaning, catering to people's
often silly emotions).

In an effort to thoroughly fix anything I might be doing wrong
personally in my treatment of people after my ex filed for divorce a
couple of years ago, I explored all sorts of things, including
hypnotherapy and healing techniques like this one -
http://www.yuenmethod.com

I found the latter extremely helpful and the guy who developed it
very smart. I plan to do a long workshop to learn more about it, but
in using the method I've helped a lot of people in very effective and
lasting ways, including my ex.

One thing Yuen points out is that if you know what the problem really
is, you don't have the problem. You see the solution and fix it,
often instantly.

I've seen this work in scripts. In the case of every single feature I
sold, I put a final polish on the script based on an epiphany I had
about the story. In productions I've done, there was ALWAYS a crucial
"this could be the end of this" moment which, when pushed through,
revealed something that needed to be fixed. It was always similar to
the script midpoint "leap of faith" that heroes and heroines take to
transform/empower themselves in great movies.

I've never had much luck with people who live their lives in fear. I
don't deal well with "private" people because I've generally found
them not to be prudent but terrified if not downright nuts.

There's an old term "Who dares, wins." I've found it takes that in a
writing career, if you want to make a living at it. In life, in
relationships, I've found that "fortune favors the bold" too.

In the past week I tried another hypnotherapy session with someone
who has been very helpful in the past. It was about what major
project I should push through to sell for a lot of money. The session
was OK, but then I shifted and picked a love story to finish even
though I was a little uncertain about picking that one.

Later, I got angry about that pick and emailed the hypnotherapist and
talked to her on the phone about how I thought the session was
basically b.s. and that I'd picked that project because for some
stupid reason I'd been in a place for a long time where I thought I
had to cater to women (and women readers, this was a book we were
talking about). One term for it is propitiation - a "please like me"
weak, begging type of attitude.

I realized I was totally crippling myself with such an attitude and
that many, many times in my life I've triumphed by simply going
forward with what I chose to do, no matter what adverse opinions I
got from people I knew.

In short, I could see what needed to be done and went about doing it,
knowing unshakably I was right.

So that's the end of hypnotherapy for me and I told her so (she
wasn't real happy about that). I didn't fail to thank her for what
had worked in the past, though, and since I was paying for it, c'est
la vie.

In movies I admire, from To Kill A Mockingbird to Lawrence of Arabia
to Die Hard to Braveheart, strong characters do tough things
necessary for society no matter what the potential harm personally.
They have vision and see what needs to be done and do it.

Ultimately, I think people really like that and want that. I think
most people truly want to be that bold and effective. I don't think
enough people have the guts to be that way and that's a big reason
why they live frustrated lives.

So my point of view has permanently shifted. As you know if you've
been on this group any length of time, I've had some very down
moments in my life. Still, I get through them with the help of
friends and my own inventiveness and maybe the grace of God.

If you have a script or a story or a novel or a book that you're just
not quite scoring with, maybe what I've been through will help you.
What's the essence of it? That's like saying, what are YOU really all
about? Some times it takes a process (like a lot of rewriting) to
discover that essence. Some times it takes growing up personally.

And here's another thing. Over the weekend I had lunch with a friend
and told her about one last vestige of post-divorce problems I'd had
and she remarked that it sounded like guilt to her, like I felt
guilty about sleeping with someone other than my ex, despite
everything. She was right. I had a set of realizations about guilt
I've felt in various periods of my life, thinking I might be somehow
responsible, like when my dad went nuts and screwed up our family. I
was reminded of the basic "solution" that happens when you do the
Yuen method on someone - it always boils down to something they
couldn't do anything about, and they flipped the switch to "off" in
that particular area of their life and thereafter had trouble with.

So that applies to writing, too. If you hit a point in a script where
you feel you just can't do anything about it - a plot, the time to
write, etc. - you might say screw it and walk away.

That's not being a problem solver. If you'll just set it aside and
decide that the right thing to do about that script or your writing
career in general will come along, it will, as long as you don't give
up on it. You can solve ANY writing problem, believe me.

Funny, the next day after having those realizations about guilt I
learned of a new book by Shelby Steele about "white guilt" and
realized he was right about something that's heavily crippled
American society. It's a very thought-provoking book. It's funny how
the microcosm and the macrocosm seem to come together when you find
the right thing as I did.

I don't think I'll ever be in an anything but equal mode with women
ever again. Guess this was all a very hard lesson I had to learn. I
also know that I'll never feel a need to weaken myself in a
professional situation again. I already told one production company I
had a project with that I wasn't doing business with them any more. I
decided I don't like their methods and I don't trust them. Unlike in
the past, I will not question my decision because I know my instinct
is right."

Handling information overload

2006-05-04T11:40:00.000+12:00

Sometimes I realise I know an awful lot of stuff.

I'm not being bigheaded, it's just part of my job. Or, more to the point, jobs. Because I'm involved in so many industries - marketing, technology, filmmaking... and all of those industries have subsectors themselves - I have to be aware of a lot of stuff.

How to manage all this information? This is a very important question for just about everyone today. Here's how I do it - and this is more of an underlying principle than a practical how-to.

Overlaps
In her psychology studies, my wife Marie is under constant threat of information overload.

She's got a textbook the size of Albert Park, a study guide the size of a paperback Albert Park,
a CD-Rom, and lots of web links. And a husband who keeps asking "have you read this article?"

What she's learning is that it all overlaps with each other - after a while. As she learnt it, I realised I'd learnt this as well, but never articulated.

Mapping
It's just like arriving at a new city. If you're there for a holiday, you get to know the key tourist destinations, the place you're staying and little else.

But if you want to live in the city, you get to know the geography in much more detail, particularly the routes you often take.

What starts out as a huge, unfamiliar city becomes full of familiar haunts, and eventually you discover where one road (let's say the road you associate with going to work) links up with another road (the road to your best friend's place).

Gradually you get so familiar with it that you can form a mental map of the city in your mind. This is just what any area of learning is like.

When I first read about European history, all the books assumed I knew where Spain and France and Italy and Germany ... etc. ... were. I had to have an Atlas handy for the first few books, but eventually I began to remember places in relation to each other.

And then it struck me - that information will never be irrelevant! Europe will physically always be the same, even though borders change, and barring the possibility of an absolute disaster rearranging the continent.

So if you're learning anything new, be encouraged. What looks like a nebulous mass of information will soon become knowledge that you can use, and, more importantly, keep and build on.

The Diary Of A 21-st Century Adman

2006-05-01T14:14:00.000+12:00

I've just discovered The Diary Of A 21-st Century Adman, the blog of copywriter Scott L Haines.

It's interesting to see the traditional long-copy style of a direct marketing copywriter morph into the more personal, frank and unpolished style of a blog.

As a copywriter, I learnt a lot about the "classic direct marketing" style of writing, but I could also see that the web was spawning a whole different style of communication.

"Classic DM" is effective - it's tested, after all, so if it wasn't effective, people wouldn't use it - but there's something about it that makes me uncomfortable.

It's hard to put my finger on why it makes me uncomfortable, so here are a few uneasy stabs in the dark as to why:

It claims to be written to the individual, yet it is actually mass-produced, assuming the motivations and intents of a segment of the population. Segmentation isn't the same as writing to an individual.
It idolises the letter as the "control package" for marketing, even though barely anyone sends letters anymore. Except for businesses.
You never know when the writer is being genuine, or when they are being calculatedly familiar with you.

Now all of this is gross generalisation, and the same or worse accusations could be turned towards more bloggy methods of marketing.

But it's encouraging to see what Scott has done:

* He's told a story where he made a mistake. That says to me a) he's human, and b) I'll learn from his mistake.

* His blog is open to comments - pretty essential for a blog. However, comments are moderated, and when I visited there were no comments showing.

* You can subscribe to the blog. However, not by RSS, which is the most sensible way to subscribe. So, this sort of confirms my theory that the marketing geniuses of "classic direct marketing" may struggle to understand actual behaviour on the web.

Of course, I may be wrong with this. In the end, whoever has the greatest pay packet from their web marketing efforts wins.

But if it comes to a choice between communicating on a real level, and obfuscating to facilitate a mere transaction, I'll choose the former.

Receive "Leadership Issues" in the email

2006-04-30T16:30:00.000+12:00

I recently decided I wouldn't keep on with my old Communicate! newsletter for two reasons:

After switching hosts, I lost most of my list (ie they didn't resubscribe). From 500 subscribers down to about 40. Not to worry, because...
I'm not writing newsletters any more. I'm blogging!

That's why you can now subscribe to this blog by email. Either click here or just fill in the form over there ->

Thanks!

Tsotsi

2006-04-28T07:11:00.000+12:00

Take all steps necessary to see Tsotsi. It is great.

From a leadership point of view, the eponymous main character's journey is interesting, but what really impressed me were the actions of John, father of the abducted child. Look out for him when you see it.

I've written a full review in a little notebook and also, thankfully, online at my DIY Film School blog.

Book review: The Truth About Lies

2006-04-27T06:26:00.000+12:00

It's a fascinating premise: two former cops, one of whom is FBI-trained, dish the dirt on how to tell if someone is lying.

And it's the compelling substance of this book that helps me overlook the errors of style that make this book a sometimes annoying read.

The Truth About Lies covers methods of truth-detecting in the past and present, looking at the blood-curdling ordeals of the dark ages, the kind-of science phrenology that, while maligned now, gave physiologists and psychologists some valuable clues to how our brains work.

There's a tour through the parts of the brain that light up when you lie, the polygraph and how it works, and some of the latest scientific methods to uncover the truth.

That's all very interesting, but not so practical unless you're going to join the police. So the book also looks at visual and verbal clues people drop to unwittingly show their deceit. The book also repeats a warning several times: none of these methods are foolproof. Sometimes nervous people who are telling the truth come across as deceptive. Sometimes liars are so accomplished that they can fly right over your internal radar (although not the polygraph, not if the questions are being asked right).

The most useful part for me was a guide to conducting an interview - something I do regularly as a journalist. They use the acronym INTERACTIVE to help prepare for an interview:

I - introduce yourself
N - non-judgemental
T - truth-telling environment
E - explain the process
R - remove distractions
A - actively listen
C - consider physical distance or closeness
T - tea, coffee or water
I - interviewee - are they comfortable?
V - verbal and non-verbal behaviours
E - encourage the interviewee

It's good stuff, whether you're a police interviewer, journo or counsellor.

The Truth about Lies fell short for me in its style of writing. It feels under-edited. Some chapters feel like a very long introduction with no substance, other sections feel like repetitions of the same point over and over again.

Some points in the book reminded me of high school essays - or, in fact, some magazine articles. You get the feeling the authors have a word or page quota to meet, and they're padding like crazy to get there. Consider this at the end:

"This is it, the last few words, in the last moments of our journey. The time has come for a fitting conclusion, some powerful closing words. Something that will have you thinking about this journey long after you've finished this book. Something political, perhaps.."

They then do go on with a political message, which to my mind has only peripheral bearing on the story.

Failings and ramblings aside, The Truth About Lies gives you inside information from the people who should know how to get the truth.

The other end of this link says they're out of stock, so perhaps try your local bookstore in Australia or New Zealand. If you're elsewhere, the publisher is ABC Books, and maybe contacting them directly will get you to the bottom of things.

Promise vs. Reality

2006-04-25T12:55:00.000+12:00

Jack keeps on coming up with great responses to my posts, which in turn spawn other posts. Thanks Jack!

His latest comment had a point I wanted to pick up on:

" I do not ultimately worry about which way [virtual vs. real world] we go provided people are taught the notions of responsibility and honour."

Therein lies the rub. Technology promises a lot, but what we receive from it is largely determined by how well we are educated to deal with it.

The same goes for democracy - an appropriate topic on the day Aussies and Kiwis celebrate those of us who have fallen in battle (usually for the sake of freedom and democracy), and so soon after Iraq actually has a government.

(A side note on that: it's actually really hard to find news on this very significant development; instead there are tons of reports on the mounting casualty list, car bombings, etc. Biased media? Surely not...)

Anyway, the more I've learnt about democracy, the more I agree with Winston Churchill when he said "Democracy is the worst form of government except for all those others that have been tried."

It's got it's shortcomings, but democracy is intended to ensure fairness and freedom. But I, an individual citizen, can't do much with my freedom unless I understand how the system works. And unfortunately, it can only be dumbed down so much.

Same with technology. It's incredibly powerful, and, like democracy, it exists in a free market. So there's Mac and/or PC, Internet Explorer and/or Firefox.

If simplicity were all that mattered, we would only be allowed to have one OS and one browser. That way, everyone would understand what it's all about, and be able to use technology to it's full potential.

As it is, we have a competitive system where price, features and benefits all collide, and, as Roy Williams' Jetsons-like story shows (start from "Let me tell you how screwed up I am...") getting them to work together creates all kinds of problems we never had before.

So, what am I saying? Education is the key. Or at least a key. But it must be an education unlike anything we've seen or identified before. Who knows what form it might take? Any ideas?

Psychology Today: Press for Success

2006-04-25T00:31:00.000+12:00

Psychology Today: Press for Success

Continuing the conversation with Wilf Jarvis

2006-04-24T21:30:00.000+12:00

Last time, I published part of an email discussion between myself and Wilf Jarvis, founder of four quadrant leadership.

He said something that bothered me:

"We cannot have personal-relationships with electronic devices; but, for countless children, adolescents and adults, captivity to things is diminishing close, dependable relationships with people."

So I asked him:

Is it not possible that technology is actually facilitating closer relationships between people? Relationships that couldn't have taken place previously, for example, this conversation we're having now by email?

He said:

"This kind of interaction is better than none at all, but I would not call this a conversation. We could have benefited more through a phone link, or could improve that interaction via video conference. But the best “meeting” would be in a face-to-face conversation where we exchanged not only words, but also inflections, vocal signals, bodily mannerisms in our endeavour to achieve a true meeting, and thus a genuine conversation. Subsequent to that kind of relationship, our emails would allow us to feel far closer to each other, and much more adequate in translating the meanings of our electronic interchange, than we can now.

During my drive to work this morning, halted by traffic lights, I saw four girls, same age and from the same school, waiting for their bus. Each stood in psychological solitary confinement, listening to their separate iPods. Research evidence from Sydney secondary schools predicts that, during recess times today, girls of their age will be more concerned about receiving or not receiving text messages on their cell phones than about spontaneous conversations.

A recent study of three hundred sons of senior executives showed that, on average, they experienced about thirty five minutes in one-on-one conversations with their dad each week, and about twenty hours with electronic devices. The boys were aged 13-15. Which of those two sets of “communications” will be more powerful in shaping the value systems of those adolescent males? Another local study has shown that teenagers prefer TV shows depict that people competing with each other in “I-win-you-lose contests,” or so-called “reality TV” presentations where victims of the groups are eliminated sadistically.

Numerous wives of executives complain to me about their husbands’ “addictions” to emails and mobile phones!!

One student in my class asked me, “Wilf, do you remember when there was no TV?” The group disbelieved my reply. “I remember when nobody I knew had a radio!” After some hilarity the questioner followed with. “Well, before TV, when the family sat in the lounge room, where did you look?”

I could go on for a long time with illustrations that confirm an axiom I have studied and taught for fifty-five years. It is this. Societies can remain stable systems indefinitely if technology does not change. (EG Australian aboriginals, NZ Maori etc. etc.) But when technology alters, so does society. We have not been successful in accepting thousands of beneficial technological innovations without sacrificing needs that are essential for our growth and progress as humans.

Wants have become needs, and many needs have been sacrificed in the endless pursuit for more newly invented and widely publicised wants.

Read the article in “Time”, April 10. It is headed. “Are kids too wired for their own good?”

I'm usually a technology optimist. I'm far more likely to agree with Vincent Heeringa, who in the latest Idealog has written about "Generation C" - wired youths for whom the C stands for 'Community'.

But it's hard to simply reject what Wilf is saying because he's of an older generation. This is a behavioural scientist, someone who has not only thought about but studied and observed the issues.

Adding fuel to the fire is the current discussion at Virtual Chautaqua, where Bob Seidensticker is dissing the hype around technology and - among other things - saying that technology can enslave as much as it can enrich.

Of course, these are not Luddites. After all, it is a virtual discussion taking place on the internet. But as with so many things, the burden of knowledge is heavy. And if we don't take up that burden, that responsibility of understanding how things work, those things end up running us.

PS: These things come in threes... Wizard of Ads agrees with all of the above!

A conversation with Wilfred Jarvis

2006-04-19T19:38:00.000+12:00

Coming up in next month's Management Magazine is a piece I've written about the future of management education. (If I say so myself, it's a goodie - be on the watch for it.)

I had hoped to get the views of Wilfred Jarvis, founder of four quadrant leadership and recognised as Australia's most experienced behavioural scientist. Unfortunately we weren't able to connect before deadline, but we were able to have an email exchange.

We began discussing the future and so on by email, but then he said something that kind of startled me:

"...one major theme is obvious to me. People are becoming less important, and things are being given and will be given far greater priorities than the leadership of people."

Really? In this world of emotional intelligence, spiritual capital etc. etc... ? Jarvis thinks so, and continues...

"In most organisations, (private enterprise or civil service), those priorities are already obvious. The distinctions will be given further emphases in the coming years.

Regrettably then, I don’t predict a growing focus on leadership. But I am sure that those rare organisations that defy universal trends, by requiring leadership, will gain substantial advantages from that ethos.

...
On-line training is escalating everywhere. Because its processes are not confined to national boundaries, a galaxy of quick-fix programs will multiply. Those revolutions will further diminish educational processes in which instructors and students experience face-to-face relationships.

Those changes are already norms in multitudes of classrooms. We cannot have personal-relationships with electronic devices; but, for countless children, adolescents and adults, captivity to things is diminishing close, dependable relationships with people."

Regular readers of this blog will know that I'm quite a fan of the connections that can be forged through technology; connections that couldn't be forged in the past. Tomorrow I'll post my question on that to Wilfred Jarvis, and his answer.

MashupCamp--a new kind of get-together | CNET News.com

2006-04-18T13:36:00.000+12:00

MashupCamp--a new kind of get-together | CNET News.com

This is totally weird and kind of cool. A meeting with no attendance fees, no schedule as such, a whole lot of nothing, in fact, except a lot of people there.

It starts with a session where people with different mashups - I presume a mashup of different software applications; the term is not explained in the article - have 30 seconds to pitch their ideas to the crowd.

Then comes the impromptu scheduling. Who wants to lead a discussion? Come up on stage, tell us briefly what it is, we'll see if there are enough people interested and then claim your time and space and away you go.

Very, very interesting.

Authority

2006-04-12T22:05:00.000+12:00

I subscribe to the daily meditation from the Henri Nouwen Society for some interesting insights on life from a spiritual perspective. Today's message really struck a chord:

The Authority of Compassion

Mostly we think of people with great authority as higher up, far away, hard to reach. But spiritual authority comes from compassion and emerges from deep inner solidarity with those who are "subject" to authority. The one who is fully like us, who deeply understands our joys and pains or hopes and desires, and who is willing and able to walk with us, that is the one to whom we gladly give authority and whose "subjects" we are willing to be.

It is the compassionate authority that empowers, encourages, calls forth hidden gifts, and enables great things to happen. True spiritual authorities are located in the point of an upside-down triangle, supporting and holding into the light everyone they offer their leadership to.

As I post this I've just returned from a PR industry event, and I noticed, despite not wanting to, the superficiality of the industry. Not to say that most of the people I met aren't nice people, but I didn't get the sense I was meeting the real person most of the time.

How does this relate to what I've posted? Because sometimes our perceptions of success, like authority, are of something that is necessarily far away and hard to reach. At least that's the impression I got. I'd like to think there's a different way.

NZ businesses see China as threat - survey

2006-04-10T11:17:00.000+12:00

New Zealand's source for business, stock market & currency news on Stuff.co.nz: NZ businesses see China as threat - survey

I wonder what really makes the difference between opportunity and threat.

That's the thing with surveys, they're a scientific measure of opinion, but that opinion is always necessarily subjective. Are these Kiwi businesses who see China as a threat acting on real data, or on our national inferiority complex?

I guess it's kind of pointless asking that kind of question. But interesting nonetheless.

A thought for the weekend - being creative and wise

2006-04-07T18:35:00.000+12:00

I was just reading Acting Up on Fastcompany and found this marvellous quote which I'll leave with you for the weekend:

What qualities are most important to succeed in a creative industry?

Almost everybody who gets into this field at some point had some higher artistic or altruistic goal, and that can be lost over time because it's a field dictated by commerce. But the person who's able to maintain that certain degree of integrity, sensibility, business ethics, and a moral approach to their work inspires a greater degree of confidence and devotion.

A plan to replace the welfare state?!

2006-04-04T17:11:00.000+12:00

Charles Murray: In our hands: A plan to replace the welfare state - 31 Mar 2006 - Books

Very interesting book review. I wish I'd written it :)

The book reviewed has a startling idea, but one that I can really imagine working:

"First, Murray proposes to do away with all government transfer payments, including such social welfare programs as Medicare and Social Security, with agricultural and corporate subsidies.

This much should be expected, I suppose, from the author of Why I Am a Libertarian.

But wait. Then comes the second part.

Murray proposes a radical, and completely un-libertarian, redistribution of wealth. All the money that now funds the nation's welfare programmes (social and corporate) would be returned in the form of a $10,000 annual cash payment to every American over the age of 21."

I think it's precisely because I can imagine it working that it would work. It's kind of out-there, but it is understandable, both to economists and to the everyday people who would receive such a payment.

And that's the thing. Some solutions to problems can be fantastic, but they can also be complex. Only when the solution can be articulated in a simple format will it catch on.

Powerless!

2006-04-03T13:17:00.000+12:00

Everything stopped at around 11am this morning. No power. The whole of West Auckland was out for around an hour and a half.

Amazing. Power cuts happen rarely around here, and I was astounded just how few useful options I had left.

Work? Only on paper, which is good, but limited usefulness.

Cook some lunch? Er, no.

Have a shower? As long as the hot water lasts. (Delaying showers till after 11am is one of the 'benefits' of working from home)

Watch TV? Duh!

Listen to some music? Unless I make it, ain't nothing happening.

Even the phone wouldn't work, because it's a fax/phone which plugs into the power.

Incredible experience. We should all go through it sometimes.

Interestingly, at the time the power went off I was reading this article from The Future of Work Agenda newsletter about how we're all crazy busy, and yet not getting much done. It's very interesting - I recommend you read it while the power's still on!

Sharansky's leadership

2006-03-31T09:30:00.000+12:00

I mentioned in a recent post I'd been reading The Case For Democracy: The Power of Freedom to Overcome Tyranny and Terror, and it's helped consolidate some of my nascent political thinking (triple word score!).

On a completely different level, the author, Natan Sharansky, provides a great case study in personal diplomacy.

Here is someone writing about very current and relevant issues, and about very visible public people with whom he continues to have a working relationship. Those aren't easy waters to navigate, since if he comes across too critical of someone he might burn his bridges.

However, neither can he go soft on people with whom he disagrees. This book is a really good example of addressing ideas without attacking people. For instance, Sharansky describes former US president Bill Clinton is described as an excellent listener, even though he then criticises Clinton's handling of the peace process in the Middle East.

He does the same thing describing many of those he had direct dealings with, and I give him full credit for his grace and integrity. It's something we don't really see a lot of in public dialogue.

As you might be able to tell, I really enjoyed this book. I'll no doubt refer to it again on this blog, and possibly even do a proper book review over at Blogcritics.

Corporate church - good idea?

2006-03-29T14:04:00.000+12:00

If you're interested, I've posted a synthesis of my thoughts on whether churches should go corporate or not here at my I think I'm a fundamentalist blog.

Kiwis lack mental toughness, says Mallard - 28 Mar 2006 - National News

2006-03-28T10:58:00.000+12:00

Kiwis lack mental toughness, says Mallard - 28 Mar 2006 - National News

This is one of those headlines that makes your blood boil - and it seems to come after every Commonwealth or Olympic Games.

After my initial reaction of "let's see you try a triathlon, Mr. Mallard", I thought I'd actually read the article and see what he said.

It's food for thought. There's always the question of isn't it all about participating, and it doesn't matter where you come? To which there is always the answer if you're not playing to win, don't play at all.

Interesting comments here from SPARC (Sports and Recreation Council I think) head Nick Hill:

"New Zealanders have a very strong tradition of fairness and letting everyone have a good go and sometimes I think that prevails over that outright desire to be the best in the world. I think Australians are ahead of us in that."

As a former businessman "my experience is that they are extraordinarily direct and ruthless compared to New Zealand.

"New Zealanders tend to be too nice."

That lines up with comments I've heard in the business world too. And the same day, there are headlines about New Zealand having one of the world's highest rates of domestic violence. Yikes!

A few words on freedom

2006-03-27T10:45:00.000+12:00

I'm not much of a political thinker, but I am learning - as we all should be. I guess right now I'm slightly to the right of centre, but I recently finished a book that showed me it's not all about left and right.

The Case for Democracy by Natan Sharansky makes a clear division between nations where someone can express a dissenting view without fear - a free society - and a fear society where dissent is squelched.

Using his own examples as a dissident in the Soviet Union, and drawing on his more recent experiences as an Israel cabinet minister, Sharansky paints a very practical picture of ideas and policies that could change the world.

In agreement with the book, this editorial makes a bold case for true democracy and its power to change lives:

Best of all is the line that "though tyranny has few advocates, it needs more adversaries." One critique of the President's push for democracy is the idea that the U.S. should not too visibly support the world's democratic dissidents and movements, lest they be tainted by American associations. But we suspect that champions of liberty in places such as Egypt, Iran and China take greater courage from an America that states its purposes boldly than one that fears its own shadow. Since when did the love of liberty become the love that dare not speak its name?

3 Fantastic Quotes

2006-03-24T10:04:00.000+12:00

3 great quotes I saw at the end of Tom Watkins' Encouragementors newsletter this morning:

To do is to be. Renee Descarte, 1596- 1650.
To be is to do. Jean-Paul Satre, 1905- 1980.
Do be, do be, do. Francis Sinatra, 1915-1998.

Love it!

How To Avoid The Biggest Minefield In Consulting

2006-03-22T09:22:00.000+12:00

How To Avoid The Biggest Minefield In Consulting

Great article from Sean D'Souza here, about how to qualify your client when you're the consultant: you need to really define what they want.

It made me think about the other side of the equation - the client. How often do we want to do something in a general direction, but don't really know what we want?

I think there's an opportunity here for consultants of all kinds.

We all know there's no longer such thing as life-long job security, and very few people stay in the same industry. So, you'll have many people like myself, who want to "do something in the movies", or like my wife who wants to "do psychology".

Both of those fields have an immense number of sub-fields, and in fact, some crossover too. But looking in on an industry from the outside, it all looks mysterious.

As more and more people change careers, I predict there will be a burgeoning industry of career change navigators, who will help people get to what it is they really want.

Thinking, leisure time and culture

2006-03-21T12:11:00.000+12:00

As Marie gets into her studies, and I get into my screenwriting, my thoughts turned towards our different cultures, and their attitudes toward leisure time.

Perhaps the saddest thing about the Samoan culture Marie comes from - and I'm sure it's echoed in many more traditional cultures - is the lack of brain space to think, contemplate and really learn.

I'm sure people from any culture will relate to this: sometimes I'll meet someone, usually a distant relative from Marie's family, and try to make conversation and ... nothing happens. Absolutely nothing. Because that person is interested, really passionate about ... nothing.

I think it's not that the person has no real interests, but their culture has told them that their job in life is to shut up and get on with - whatever it is everyone's supposed to be doing. It's a singularly wasteful existence.

And it's not just more traditional cultures like that of Samoa, either. My own mother tells of how her mother used to get irritated seeing her lost in a book, or playing around. "Do something useful!", my grandma would yell. There's nothing more guaranteed to squash creativity and independent thinking. Thankfully, my grandma also loved art, and allowed my mum to enjoy that part of life without feeling guilty for not being 'busy'.

Aristotle said, "Thinking requires leisure time". Sometimes it's actual minutes and hours we need; more often it's an attitude of mind where we can ponder, mess about and come up with a new take on every day experiences.

I'm so blessed to be in the job I am in, where daily I am thinking of how to make commonplace facts more interesting and even entertaining to the readers of my articles. And to be given permission by my wife to indulge in screenwriting, which could be a perpetual hobby but also could be, just maybe, a lucrative business.

If you're reading this, chances are you already have "leisure time" in your head. People who feel they should be "doing something" aren't likely to read a blog. But if you know someone caught in the "busy mindedness" trap, today help them to step off the treadmill, and see the fascinating thing that is our shared life on planet earth.

Re-vision business at virtual chautaqua

2006-03-16T11:01:00.000+13:00

There's so much great stuff to read sometimes; I wish I could spend the whole day just taking it all in.

However my little bit of learning today comes from Virtual Chautaqua, where they're currently discussing Ginger Grant's book "Re-visioning the way we work".

The concept of the book is fascinating: Using Joseph Campbell's heroic journey as a prototype for business change.

I don't know whether it's my increasing interest in story and the movies, but it seems Joseph Campbell is everywhere I turn! It's interesting to see the direction Grant has taken the idea in.

Here are some quotes from the book:

"Using a broad definition of creativity, to provide a corporate structure that is innovative and open to expansion is no less an artistic act than the creation of a symphony or a body of literature."

"In a for-profit, especially stock-price-driven corporate culture, decades of hard-line, profit-margin mentality have eroded the possibility of a meaningful connection between corporate leaders and employees, as well as shared participation in a corporation's fundamental vision."

"As Jungian analyst James Hillman suggests, 'Ideas we have, and do not know we have, have us.' In other words, if you don't know the myth you are living, then the myth lives you. Is it possible that if organisations lose awareness of foundational stories which contain fundamental operating principles, such organisations will flounder when they encounter difficulty? Perhaps the loss of such a powerful mythic foundation creates the difficulty in the first place?"

Join the conversation at Virtual Chautaqua.

Tags: Joseph Campbell, Change Management, Myth, Organisational Psychology.

The power of a visible goal

2006-03-14T13:14:00.000+13:00

All last week I was in a workshop with LA-based screenwriter Paul Margolis, who was coaching some of us kiwi screenwriters on how to sell direct to Hollywood.

Needless to say, it was a fascinating week, where we got to meet kindred spirits, talk about our passion and get solid feedback from Paul and from each other. It was amazing to see how people's ideas developed and grew over the week.

But the best thing about the whole week was Friday night, where Paul called our collective bluffs. He said in Hollywood you usually get three months to write a script. That's 12 weeks - and with usualy screenplay lengths, that's 10 pages a week. That's 2 pages a day, assuming you take weekends off. That's roughly half a page an hour.

All of a sudden, instead of an abstract goal - writing a Hollywood screenplay - we had a frighteningly tangible goal: a completed first draft by June 2nd. The scariest part was four hours a day working on the script.

It was scary but it worked. It was like the mid-point in a movie where the hero can no longer go back to his ordinary life. We were no longer amateurs and strangers; we are now a band of writers, mutually committed to a deadline. We're all working on different projects, but one of the key motivators will be not wanting to look silly in front of the others come June 2nd.

Now I'm motivated! And today will be my first four hour shift. I'm going out tonight, but even if I'm up in the wee hours - I'll be doing that four hours. Because I've found a) what I love to do, and b) a system of discipline to help me do it.

I'll keep you posted.

Communication - so much going on

2006-03-13T12:17:00.000+13:00

As I interviewed two people for an article today I marvelled at how much goes on when you're sitting across from someone, simply talking.

A lot of it is unconscious, of course. I guess most people don't even think about it. The only reason I do is that I realised I kind of think like a computer - where a conversation is a transfer of information, nothing more, nothing less.

In reality, none of us thinks like a computer. In every conversation, your mind is assessing:

your environment
the other person(s) - their intent, personality, and most importantly how much like us they are
the body language, pauses, backtracks, and facial expressions of the other person

and finally

what they're saying

The reason I thought I think like a computer was that, as an interviewer, I'm so focused on the information aspect of it that I can't take in the multitude of other stimuli.

Why am I mentioning this? In case there are other souls like me out there who, for some reason or another, suffer information overload during a simple conversation. The first step towards changing your overload reaction is being aware. And it's amazing what you can do when you're aware.

Richard Taylor - egomaniac?

2006-03-08T10:25:00.000+13:00

That's probably the headline you're least likely to see anytime soon.

Richard Taylor, head of WETA workshop and now 5-time Oscar winner, is a consummately nice guy. Over the days since the Oscars, I've heard him repeatedly say that his wins are wins for the whole WETA team - the same line he's taken at every previous win.

Taylor knows the power of the media - how when you're famous, every little word means something, even if it doesn't in reality. So he sticks carefully to the message that's most important to him - that it's not about him personally, it is about the dedicated men and women who work without the public recognition.

Being any sort of leader is like being famous on a smaller scale. Marie's finding that in her job as a supervisor. Words and actions take on a symbolic, as well as an actual, meaning. So while it may seem unnecessary to repeat and reinforce your key messages, people notice if you do, and they notice if you don't.

Full credit to Taylor, not just for leading the winning team, but also for being so remarkably consistent in acknowledging the work of that team.

Confidence + Knowledge

2006-03-06T11:20:00.000+13:00

I was watching Aliens on the weekend - great movie - and thought about how Ripley counterpointed with the arrogant team of marines. (This will make no sense unless you've seen the film)

Ripley had knowledge, but at first no confidence - just nightmares. The marines had bucketsfull of confidence, but no knowledge, and, come to think of it, little wisdom!

As I watched I thought about my approach to life. I tend to put a lot of stock in knowledge, because in the past I've been burned through lack of it.

Particularly in my mind was the Crossover experience - an experience that played out partly on these pages - which was simultaneously the best and worst experience of 2005.

But a lot of the problem with me was lack of knowledge. I was suddenly a co-producer of an independent film, with zero knowledge of how things worked. There were so many reasons why I got out of the project, and why it eventually aborted, but in hindsight my lack of knowledge made it nearly impossible to play my part.

It's actually good to go through that sort of experience - once. It shows you how much you need to learn.

However, there's a point where you know as much as you can know without doing stuff. It's like a chemical reaction - you need just the right amount of element A (knowledge) and element b (confidence), and you get an explosion! (A good one)

So, just like Ripley was able to put her first-person knowledge of the Alien to work, gathering confidence but not cockiness, so I am aiming to put the hard-learned lessons of 2005 - and the continually growing knowledge of 2006 - into action, in controlled, well-planned bits.

Breakfast of Champions

2006-03-02T12:18:00.000+13:00

I'm opening my kimono here by being vulnerable ... and probably stating the banally obvious, but it wasn't obvious to me.

This morning I failed on a job - what I wrote wasn't what the client wanted, nowhere near. Worse still, they needed something asap so they got in another writer.

Of course, I felt stink. It's easy to take something like that to mean I am a failure personally, and can never succeed in my chosen profession.

In the past, I would be only fleetingly aware of this feeling, and try to 'press on regardless'. But I'm becoming a lot more aware of myself lately - maybe it's Marie's psychology studies, maybe it's just maturity with age - and I changed my own rules.

First of all, I kept open the channels of communication to my client. Through that, I realised they didn't blame me for missing the mark on this job, and were still prepared to work with me in future.

Secondly, I asked to see the eventual piece of copy that worked. This will help me know what their needs are for that client if I can help them in the future.

Just following those two steps helped me feel immeasurably better about myself, and my chances of living long and prospering.

To follow up, I sent a request for feedback to another client for whom I'd just finished a job yesterday. Sometimes in solo/freelance professions helpful feedback is nonexistent or only extreme ("I loved it", or "we can't use this"), so it helps to get something more consistent. And to do that, you've got to ask for it.

In The One Minute Sales Person, it says "Feedback is the Breakfast of Champions". I'm going to make sure I have breakfast every day.

Getting mobile: JasJar product review

2006-03-02T10:26:00.000+13:00

For almost a month I've been using (on loan) the iMate JasJar as part of a story I'm doing for Management Magazine.

In the brief 1500 words I'm given I don't have any space to mention what the product is like, so I'll post a review here because:

It's relevant to just about anybody who wants to be more productive these days
I can
I might catch the eye of some editor who's looking for a great product reviewer, and/or
I might catch the eye of some vendor who's looking for someone to shower their products upon!

One lives in hope.

I'll start with the only two gripes I have about the JasJar, because otherwise it is perfect. It's just a bit big to carry around all the time, and a bit bulky for the pocket - a kind of tough problem to overcome, because I wouldn't be fond of a smaller keyboard!

Second gripe is that it's designed for a right-handed person, so I actually block my own view when I scroll down, unless I suddenly become ambiguous. Sorry, ambidextrous!

But as I mentioned, it's near perfect in every other way. It combines a phone with a computer running Windows Mobile 5, which means if you're a Windows user (if you don't know, you probably are) you'll be in familiar territory.

It's amazing how many ways around you can have this beasty. The screen twists like a Tablet PC, which means you can have it like a laptop, or twist and fold the screen to be like a little notepad. Handwriting recognition's also surprisingly good, even when I do my doctor impression.
The big question is: how useful is it to me? Does it really add value? It certainly has in this past month as I've been working on three stories and trying to tee up others ... driving cars ... catching buses ... waiting in waiting rooms!

Being able to check email remotely was a godsend when I'm out of the office all day. It also helped to be able to look things up on the web, and use Word, Excel and even PDF files on the go. Only trouble with PDFs, though, is they're not that user friendly on the small screen. Nice touch, though!

An unusual side-effect of having the JasJar was increased popularity. You're automatically a more interesting person when you have a tiny computer, and inquiring minds want to know what it is you're doing...

I've got to admit, there were some times I just checked email because I could. And I suppose therein lies the danger of mobile technology - not within the technology itself, but in the people who use it.

So... at $1999 retail, would I actually go out and buy an iMate JasJar? I'm normally a very conservative technology buyer - it takes a lot for the benefits to outweigh the cost in my estimation. But after a month of being able to check emails on the run, being able to check IMDb right after seeing a movie, and working on the bus .... I'm really, really tempted.

Thanks to Vodafone and their PR agency Mango for the lend of the JasJar and also the Vodafone Mobile Connect Card. Much appreciated.

Charting your way to new knowledge

2006-03-01T17:04:00.000+13:00

Anyone who knows me knows how much I love Star Trek. So it hits the spot to compare knowledge processing to surveying a new planet!

Which is all a long-winded way of getting to what it says on that page:
In problem-based learning, each student group is like a party of explorers entering new territory. As a group they decide what neighboring areas they should reconnoiter, the individual members scout these areas and return to describe things they discovered that are relevant to the party’s interests. It is important in this process that the scouts know what they are looking for (have well-defined learning issues). In this effort, each member learns different things that get integrated and used to make decisions. Not all of the information will be transmitted to the others. When the expedition is over and the party needs to summarize their explorations, they draw a map that captures the important features of the territory. This would correspond to a PBL group constructing a concept map. The instructor or tutor serves as a native guide in this analogy.

This is from the University of Delaware's Chemistry department, and I found it after doing a Wikipedia search on "Mind Mapping".

What got me started?

I don't often visit Creating Passionate Users, one of the blogs on my blogroll, but when I do, it's usually for a long time!

This time it was for some research into working spaces for an article I'm writing, but as sometimes happens, something else caught my eye.

That article was quite interesting, but what interested me more was this:

"We don't use the concept of a conventional "outline" for our books--mind maps take us from initial brainstorming to final storyboards."

This is one of those things that is so obvious, yet I don't put it into practice. I've been frustrated with the limitations of outlines for a long time, but never put the time in to discover how to get the best out of mind maps.

So further down in the article I found a link to some free mind-mapping software, and then a quick Wikipedia search on the term "mind-mapping" and its cousin "concept mapping" ... and the rest is history.

Happy mapping!

Tags: Writing, Mind-Mapping, Information Management.

North Country thoughts

2006-02-27T15:19:00.000+13:00

Last week I blogged about a whole bunch of movies, including North Country.

Such a good movie! (Warning, spoilers below... stop right here if you don't want to know how the story turns out!)

I was first of all interested in how it was marketed. Here in New Zealand, it was presented as a feel-good film that would make you glad to be alive (or something like that).

Strange, because the first half of the film displays a really hard life - hard mining work, poverty, and the constant threat of sexual assault.

But the marketing was right, the final scenes of this film make you feel like you yourself have won a great victory. While a tragedy shows everything that should be right going wrong, this shows everything going wrong, then coming right. It's brilliantly done.

What about Leadership?
Most obvious candidate for best character is Charlize Theron's character, Josie Ames. While her female co-workers are willing to settle for horrible treatment because of fear, she can't abide the status quo.

Both she and her co-workers see the same thing: gross injustice in the present, the difficulty of changing it, and the possibility of it getting worse if any complaint backfires. But while they see that as a reason not to do anything, she sees it as an unacceptable situation that must be changed.

She's willing to go through the risk, endure attacks on every area of her life, and even have a deep dark secret dredged up - all to change life for the better. And her example inspires others.

So, without a doubt, Josie is the hero of this story.

But I also noticed her father, Hank. He begins the movie as everything that's wrong with men in this story. He's not one of the ones who abuse and harrass, but he is one of the ones who stand by let it happen. He has no honour, only a sense of shame in his daughter. Selfish, and downright unmanly!

His character is painted so thoroughly apathetic that I wondered if he would ever change. So when he got up and stood by his daughter in the union meeting, I nearly cried. Finally, you're becoming a man! Better late than never.

However, that's easy to say from the cinema seat. What would be the scenario if it was me there, in a culture absolutely entrenched in the status quo, where your entire social network depends on getting on with these SOBs, harrassers, abusers? I'd like to think I'd stand up sooner than Hank did, to realise my job as a father was to protect my daughter, not my own reputation.

Last post I talked about the character's journey. Hank had one hell of a journey.

Are you Peter, Susan, Edmund or Lucy?

2006-02-24T08:46:00.000+13:00

Yesterday I mentioned the movies I'd been seeing lately, and how the good vs. evil movies left the biggest impression on me.

Today I want to talk about the main characters of The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe, and the personal journeys they took. Spoiler alert: if you haven't seen the film, and don't want to know what happens, you'd best save reading this till later.

In film parlance, it's called the character arc - a term I don't like so much, because an arc starts low, gets to a peak and then lands down low again. A really satisfying character journey, I feel, leaves someone higher than where they started. So I'll use the term journey.

Peter (William Moseley) begins the film bearing a heavy burden. The children are without their parents, and as the eldest he feels the pressure to become a father figure. His siblings are not so sure they want that, though.

They enter into the kingdom of Narnia, where very real danger haunts them. Instead of decreasing, Peter's responsibilities increase to epic scale. First he just wants to get his brother and sisters out of Narnia safely; before he knows it, he's carrying a sword and shield, and leading armies into battle!

And then there's the disparaging voice of reason, coming from sister Susan: "Just because Father Christmas gave you a sword doesn't make you a hero!"

Thankfully, there's another voice - the terrifying, gentle encouragement of Aslan: "Don't help (Peter)," he says to his soldiers. "He must fight this battle." He does, and by the end he is crowned Peter the Magnificent.

Sometimes we feel we need a break from life, but instead of getting better, it gets worse. Often, that's the best thing for us.

Susan (Anna Popplewell), as the second eldest, and the eldest girl, feels some of the parental responsibility that Peter feels. But as second eldest, she also feels a little bit helpless - she never has the final decision, and feels out of control of the situation. Maybe that's why she tries to stop Peter fulfilling his destiny - because it's not safe!

It's interesting, then, that Susan receives the bow and arrow - a weapon that lets her wage war from a distance, and the perspective that comes with that. (Quite cool, too, that CS Lewis could give his female characters weapons and an active role in battle - quite something for the 1940s!)

Susan's Narnia experience gives her a sense of herself - she no longer feels like a spare wheel, or out of control. She no longer needs to control the situation, and in the end is crowned ... Susan the gentle.

Crises can give us the wherewithal to stand up and know our role for that minute - and not worry about the roles of others.

Edmund (Skandar Keynes) is in the end crowned Edmund the Just, which is ironic, considering his role as traitor in the beginning. (An interesting theological point there by CS Lewis, too.)

Edmund travels the furthest in his journey. He starts as a solitary, surly character, given to adjusting the truth to whatever's convenient. But when he's in too deep, when his love of Turkish Delight - and approval - has gotten him in deep, deep trouble, Edmund realises he has choices to make.

Time after time he must walk the line between preserving his own life and saving the lives of others. To save others, he must stay alive, so it's not a black and white choice. Where once Edmund took the easy path every time, there is no longer any easy path. He rises to the challenge.

Later, when he has been atoned for by Aslan, Edmund is suited up and ready for battle. He faces a similar challenge to Peter - fighting his own battles. Peter tells him to fall back, to retreat, but instead Edmund attacks the witch (Tilda Swinson) and saves Peter's life, risking his own.

The easy way will not always be there. Start seeing the choices you have in life early, and take the high road, not the easy road.

While Edmund has the longest character journey, Lucy (Georgie Henley) has the shortest. She begins as a child full of wonder and compassion, and ends in much the same way.

At the end, Lucy is crowned Lucy the valiant. Her valiance is driven by her compassion, and fear never gets in the way. Though she's the youngest in the family, Lucy's curiosity and credulity leads the rest into the magical wonderworld that is Narnia.

Curiosity and compassion are two forces in the world that appear weak, but are incredibly strong.

One last note: At the beginning, the siblings are a group of individuals. At the end, they are a team. Crisis taught them how to look after each other, and let each other become the best they could be.

Tags: Narnia

We need idealistic movies!

2006-02-23T12:12:00.000+13:00

This weekend just past, I had a bit of a movie marathon.

First, to test out our new surround sound system, I watched the Coen Brothers' The Ladykillers. (Sure, not much of a surround-sound film, but it was next on my list). A great film, very funny to watch and intellectually satisfying as well.

That was Friday; Saturday had me going to the Auckland War Memorial Museum for a free screening of Illustrious Energy (screening was free, admission was not... still, I'm not complaining!). Brilliant, little-known New Zealand film from the late 80s about Chinese gold miners in New Zealand's deep south.

Sunday, I went with Marie and our two mums to see The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Everything I expected and more. Just like the book, but not predictably so.

Then on Monday, Marie and I snuck into a late session of North Country at the Berkeley (thanks to Movieshack for the free ticket!). A fantastic film, not just because it was directed by New Zealander Niki Caro, but because it was a powerful story, well told.

Now, time for me to get to the point.

The Point

While I really enjoyed Ladykillers and Illustrious Energy, Narnia and North Country left a huge impression in my mind.

Why? Because they're both films about good vs. evil. In both of them, the heroes are reluctant and feel inadequately skilled. In both, the odds stacked against our hero are incredibly high. In both, good eventually wins out over evil.

If you're familiar with Joseph Campbell's "Hero's Journey", you'll see they pretty much follow the pattern. But paradoxically, that pattern, done right, never wears out it's welcome.

And it made me think - sometimes simplistic, good vs. evil stories like these are criticised as not being 'art', because they don't reflect the complexity of reality.

But maybe that's just what we need sometimes. Simplisticity! Why? Because the courage shown by our heroes helps us gain courage to face the complexity of our lives.

Please don't take this as a criticism of Ladykillers or Illustrious Energy - they are both brilliant movies. What I'm saying is that some movies give you a take-out that's just for you to use in life. Others just help you reflect and say, yes, life is like that.

Over the next couple of days I'll dig a bit deeper into what stood out to me from Narnia and North Country.

Tags: Movies, Narnia, Hero's Journey, Ladykillers, Illustrious Energy, North Country

You really know what you want when you have to wait for it

2006-02-17T17:07:00.000+13:00

Our DVD player died a couple of weeks back and we have been watching DVDs on Marie's laptop - not bad, but definitely not good! Why the delay? They've been trying to repair it.

By "repair", they mean making us wait while an optical receiver - a tiny piece of equipment - travelled on a slow boat from China. It was agony!

Thank God for Tom. He's the guy in the stockroom at the store where we returned the player. While everyone else gave me indifferent service, Tom took a commonsense approach: three weeks is too long to be without as vital a piece of equipment as a DVD player.

While policy dictated the vendor had to approve a refund or repair blah blah blah... Tom knew that we, the customers, were getting withdrawal symptoms. Enough already.

So, he organised a refund. He shot the donkey for us, and I'll always appreciate it.

Why am I singing Tom's praises on Leadership Issues? Just to give praise where praise is due, really.

But the real reason for this post is the lessons learnt while waiting. With the refund we went and got a totally different DVD player than the one that was in repair. We'd learnt over time what we needed (as much as your whims for home theatre can be classified as 'needs').

The bottom line: sometimes life makes you wait, and you can either sulk, or learn from it.

For example: most of us don't have millions of dollars, so we have to choose carefully what we invest in, whether personally or in business.

For the lottery winner, they have no such luxury of time. The money - the opportunity - is all theirs, all now, and the urgency to use it somehow is overwhelming. (I imagine!)

How many lottery winners have you met who made very sound decisions with their winnings? Sure, there are a few, but they usually learned from experience before they won. They learned through limited resources, so they could handle virtually unlimited resources.

It's the same with any limitation we experience: time, energy, health, technology. The limitations give us a chance to explore the possibilities, and discover the best path ahead over time.

Have a great weekend!

To Know What You Want, you have to let life show you

2006-02-16T21:10:00.000+13:00

Yesterday, I talked about knowing what you want. It's a great feeling when you do know exactly what you want - whether from your next conversation, or from life in general.

Top salespeople make it their business to get what they want by helping others getting what they want.

But what happens to top salespeople - or in fact persuasive types in any industry - when they realise they can make anything happen that they want. Does it take the excitement, the randomness out of life?

I've got to admit, I don't know. Y'see, I'm not naturally one of these master persuaders (despite studying the subject for years!).

However, I have met at least two fantastic people who can sell proverbial fridges to proverbial Eskimos (sorry, Inuit), who feel a sense of dissatisfaction with their current state of life. They want to experience something bigger than themselves - something that happens without them making it happen.

While they know what they want on the micro- level, they don't know what the ultimate "desire" is. Or they think they know, arrive, and are disappointed.

As for me, I've been through enough ups and downs to know that my imagination in any given moment is often not as good as what's waiting around the corner.

If I'd called the shots sometimes - if I could have anything I wanted - I would've missed out on the totally unexpected surprises life had for me. There is great treasure in the unexpected.

I'll leave you with that thought today: if you're a strong personality who prides yourself on making things happen, let life show you something bigger than yourself.

I'm not much of a country music fan, but there's a John Denver song I love: Sweet Surrender. While Denver and I would probably disagree about who we're surrendering to, I love the idea of the song.

PS: I found I'd touched on this subject before, with my post Systematic and Serendipitous, way back in 2004. Seems I've stumbled on a recurring theme.

Tags: Personal Development, Sales, John Denver

Knowing What You Want

2006-02-15T13:06:00.000+13:00

In the excellent little book The Experts' Guide to 100 Things Everyone should know How to Do, Donald Trump says of negotiation:

"Know exactly what you want, and focus on that."

It sounds easy, doesn't it. But on a micro level as well as macro, it can be difficult in any given moment to know what you want.

Asking the right questions
Take, for example, the story I'm writing right now for Management Magazine. I've been given something of a brief, but to make it a really good article, I need to:

Put myself in the shoes of the potential reader
Decide what I - in those shoes - really really want to know about the subject
Start digging - start asking questions - intelligent questions, because I've put myself so well in the shoes of my reader.

Of course, I could fake it and just ask people the question word for word from the brief, tabulate the answers and make into a half-decent article.

But here's the problem I find - people want to know what I want from them. They don't like vague.

Opportunity
And it's not just in interviewing people, either. Knowing what you want determines your attitude to information and opportunity.

For some time I've had the book How to Pass Exams on my shelf. It was one of those many books that you get because it might come in useful one day. I have a lot of books like that.

But when I showed it to my wife Marie, who is now a student, her eyes lit up. Suddenly, what was just another book became one of the most relevant and valuable books in the house.

Desire will do that to you. It will help light up the things you need to get what you want, and it will also help you filter out the things that are irrelevant, unhelpful or harmful to your goal.

Desire can be good or bad for you. And that's why it needs to be harnessed together with purpose. And when those two - purpose and desire - combine, you get focus.

More on Purpose tomorrow.

PS: Here are the rest of Donald Trump's pointers on negotiation:

Know exactly what you want, and focus on that.
View any conflict as an opportunity. This will expand your mind as well as your horizons.
Know that your negotiating partner/partners may well have exactly the same goals as you do. Do not underestimate them.
Patience is an enormous virtue and needs to be cultivated for successful negotiations on any level.
Realize that quiet persistence can go a long way. Being stubborn is often an attribute. The key is to know when to loosen up.
Remain optimistic at all times. Practice positive thinking - this will keep you focused while weeding out negative and detrimental people.
Let your guard down, but only on purpose. Watch how your negotiating partners respond.
Be open to change - it's another word for innovation.
Trust your instincts, even after you've honed your skills. They're there for a reason.
Negotiation is an art. Treat it like one.

From Experts' Guide to 100 Things Everyone Should Know How to Do, created by Samantha Ettus, Allen & Unwin 2004

Focus Point

2006-02-14T10:40:00.000+13:00

Focus Point

This guy is kinda talking about what I'm trying to get articulated this week.

For the first time since I started blogging, I struggled to structure my thoughts, and scrapped several drafts. That's probably a good thing.

Y'see, I have a lot in my head right now about Focus, Purpose and Desire. But getting it down. on paper. in. the. right. order ... is a little difficult.

So bear with me, please, as I draft and draft again. I think this is going to be important.

My wife is a student!

2006-02-13T12:41:00.000+13:00

Now that's a happy face!

Marie got her study material for her degree in Business Psychology last week - I had to capture the moment.

Marie's joy is as if she's already graduated. But the simple act of enrolling has been a long time coming.

For years Marie has wanted to study. When we got married eight years ago she had a suitcase full of all the prospectuses and application forms she'd inquired about. But the time was never right.

Part of the problem was that, while she wanted to study, she didn't know what she wanted to study. And it's very important to know that (especially under a user pays education system!).

Have you ever felt like that? That you know you want to study ... create ... fulfil something, but you just don't know what it is.

This week I'll try to address this issue of knowing what you want, through my own ongoing experiences and some books I've been dipping into lately.

Meanwhile, my own educational aspirations have taken a slightly different turn. After going on a two-day screenwriting workshop, I realised that for a filmmaker or screenwriter, letters after your name counts least. It's what you actually do that counts. So for me, a programme of tightly focused workshops might be better than a degree programme.

But it's all about knowing what you really want. When I first floated the idea to myself of being a full-time student, it was because I wanted to be nothing but a student. I was fatigued from the stresses of being in many different places at once - necessary stresses for a business owner of any kind.

But times change. We change. And we learn.

To be continued!

Robert Rodriguez: You are a filmmaker

2006-02-10T12:57:00.000+13:00

Okay, so this quote more properly belongs to my DIY Film School blog, but it's very relevant to leadership: you are what you say you are.

"So you want to be a filmmaker? First step to being a filmmaker is stop saying you want to be a filmmaker. It took me forever to be able to tell anyone I was a filmmaker and keep a straight face until I was well on my way. But the truth was, I had been a filmmaker ever since the day I had closed my eyes and pictured myself making movies. The rest was inevitable. So you don't want to be a filmmaker, you are a filmmaker. Go make yourself a business card."

That's from the inside front cover of Rebel Without a Crew, by Robert Rodriguez. Heard of him?

He's the guy behind Spy Kids, Sin City, The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl in 3-D, and more.

This book is about how he learnt, step by step, how to make movies with what he had available - cheap video equipment, and a lot of time - and became a big Hollywood director.

If there's one lesson to learn from Rodriguez, it's this: start with what you've got.

Have a great weekend!

Tags: Attitude, Chutzpah, Filmmaking.

Book Review: Philosophy in 30 Days

2006-02-09T22:34:00.000+13:00

I've always been a philosopher of sorts.

When I was 7 or 8 I remember looking in the mirror, wondering, "Why am I me and not someone else?"

And then, "If I was someone else, how would I know?"

The art of asking questions no-one can answer is one way to define Philosophy. So why is it so popular?

That's one of the questions that Dominique Janicaud tries to answer in his ambitious Philosophy in 30 Days.

Written for his teenage daughter, and therefore accessible to a wide audience, this book tries to introduce the basic 'big names' in philosophy. But more importantly, it encourages the reader to think philosophically.

Knowing that philosophy can be a daunting subject, the 30 chapters are incredibly short, taking only 5 to 10 minutes to read. Janicaud limits each chapter to a central thought, rather than overloading you with facts.

Being a translation from French, there are some ideas expressed here that necessarily come across a little clunky in English. But generally the ideas behind the words shine through.

The subject of religion comes up often in the book, first as Janicaud expresses the impossibility of a modern (or postmodern) mind to relate to the important philosophical works of St Augustine or St Thomas Aquinas, and then throughout the book, contrasting Jesus' claim that "I am the Truth" with other philoshopers' thoughts on the nature of truth.

I am pleased to say that Janicaud showed true philosophical detachment in dealing with the subject of religion - not judging it, neither insisting on it nor insisting it is wrong. I say this because another book released around the same time (The Heart of Things, by A.C.Grayling) which claims to "apply philoshophy to the 21st century", completely ridiculed religion, showing a dogmatism which seems uncharacteristic of true philosophy.

I started this book hoping for an outline of the great thinkers and their great thinkings, and this book in part does that, starting with Plato and spending quite a few chapters on Nietzche, the author's favourite philosopher.

But Janicaud also warns that many philosophers' works cannot be boiled down into a few paragraphs, and instead gives a beginner's reading list for those with the time and inclination to go further.

What this book does very well is bring up the great questions of Philosophy - questions about nature, about existence, and even about Philosophy itself - so the budding philosophical thinker can at least know the conceptual landscape in which he or she stands.

Sadly, Janicaud himself died the day after this book's first draft was published. I'm glad for his sake and his family's that he wrote down what was very important to him while he still lived.

Tags: Philosophy

Just a bit more on diet

2006-02-08T09:58:00.000+13:00

I'm realising a mistake I made last week, when I talked about what Daniel's Diet cuts out. It's not about what's missing, it's abundantly about what's there!

Of course, it is fairly important for that particular diet to avoid artificial stuff, dairy and wheat, but for any diet it's great to realise what is good for you - and go crazy with it.

Fresh fruit and vegetables, for one thing, are wonderful when you just enjoy the raw sensual joy of them! Here are naturally grown foods, each one completely different.

Perhaps that's partly what detracts from them, too. You don't know exactly what you're going to get, unlike McDonald's where it's all about predictability.

I used to prefer predictability, so I simply reprogrammed my mind. This natural stuff is better for me, and I do enjoy a good stir fry when someone else makes it, so why don't I start experimenting with the veges I know well - and some I don't! The worst that could happen is I don't like the taste.

So now, even though I stumble with naughty ice cream sometimes, it's a real treat to go to the Otara Flea Markets after dropping Marie off to work at 6am on a Saturday, and, in the glimmering dawn, choose from some of the whopping vegetables and fruit they have there.

I came home last Saturday with a spring onion about 3 feet long! And a celery I needed both hands to hold. Healthy vegetables and fruit give you such a feeling of abundance and wealth, it's amazing.

And now I'm sounding like a true nut! Must be time for my salad...

Tags: Diet, Vegetables

Looking after your body, epilogue

2006-02-07T09:28:00.000+13:00

Last week I had a bit to say about how to look after your body. In case you missed it:

Part One: Intro
Part Two: Exercise
Part Three: Food
Part Four: Why this is important

Since then, I had a really bad weekend in terms of living up to what I'm saying.

I mean really, really bad,

Pizza... fried, battered fish... ice cream. That kind of bad.

Of course, there are mitigating factors. The pizza was Marie's idea (sounds familiar: "The apple was Eve's idea!"), and the fried, battered fish was part of a spread for a family get-together. So I take extra extra seriously my last words from last week:

Does this mean that only trim, slim saints who walk every day qualify for the top jobs. Heavens no.

("Heavens no"? What was I thinking?)

But then I said this, and I still agree with it, even though it incriminates me:

But having a healthy, balanced personal life sure gives you an advantage in getting the job done, and helping everyone involved reach their potential.

With that in mind, an excellent book arrived last week, The No Diet Diet: Do Something Different. Better than Atkins, say the reviews. Didn't think much of Atkins in the first place, but let's have a look at this then...

A quick glance shows this to be very different from other books I have on the subject. Food is seldom mentioned here; instead, this is all about habits.

Chapter one begins with a Spanish proverb: "Habits are at first cobwebs, then cables." Then it says: "Turning off the TV, making someone laugh and singing in the bath can all help you lose weight!"

I think I'm going to enjoy this book. And I think I'll learn things that will apply to other areas of life as well. This sounds like it will be an eminently suitable Leadership Issues book. I'll keep you posted!

Tags: Diet, Health, Obesity, Pizza, Icecream.

Happy Waitangi Day

2006-02-06T11:19:00.000+13:00

I just checked and saw the great variety of people viewing this blog from all over the world! Kia ora and welcome, visitors from Hawaii, the mainland USA, the Netherlands, the Czech republic, Chile, Britain, South East Asia, Greece, Turkey, Pakistan and Japan. To mention a few!

Because of the international nature of you, the reader, I thought it might be good for me to explain why New Zealanders are having a day off today (except for me, of course).

It's Waitangi Day, the 'celebration' of the Treaty which really launched New Zealand as a nation in 1840. I put 'celebration' in inverted commas because these days it's more associated with protests than peace.

Why is this?

Celebration and controversy
That's a question which many a pakeha (white) New Zealander, and many immigrants, ask. And it's hard to reduce to a nutshell, but I'll try:

The original 1840 Treaty had two translations, one English, one Maori. Seems the two translations ended up saying different things, the key difference being about the word rangatiratanga - nowadays generally agreed to mean 'sovereignty'.

So, whether by accident or deliberately, the aftermath of the Treaty had the British thinking they had complete control over the country - sovereignty - and the Maori thinking the same thing.

Back then, arguments were ultimately won by who had the most guns, and the so-called Land Wars of the 1860s established British governmental control over New Zealand. (The naming of the wars as the Land Wars reflected the thinking of the time, that the wars were simply about land. Historians now refer to the wars as the New Zealand wars, reckoning they were actually about sovereignty).

A culture's resurrection
As time went by, the Maori culture grew weaker and weaker, diluted, some say, by the white man's religion, by disease, by alcohol, and later on by urbanisation. Maori families moved from their rural land to new opportunities in the city, and new generations learned that they needed to abandon the old ways, the old language, to get ahead.

It could have been the end of the Maori culture, let alone hopes for the sovereignty promised in the Treaty. But a brave group of Maori intellectuals and radicals spearheaded the so-called Maori Renaissance in the 1970s, bringing back the language, culture and - most controversially - land claims into the public eye.

What began as a movement of (relatively) peaceful yet illegal protest eventually influenced the New Zealand government at the highest levels, and today the Treaty is entrenched in legislation, and the government of the day attempts to fulfil the spirit of the Treaty as best it can.

My perspective
That's a very short nutshell approach to what the Treaty is all about. Waitangi Day is a time which tests the leadership and PR skills of all the major political leaders, who in the past have faced protest, humiliation and challenge at Waitangi.

This year, Prime Minister Helen Clark has declined to be at Waitangi, a point she is trying to play down. However it's the sort of occasion when it doesn't matter what you do or don't do, as a leader you'll be noticed.

For me, as a fifth generation pakeha New Zealander, Waitangi makes me think of a lot of things.

I'm thankful for the system of government we do have, that we inherited from Britain. A constitutional monarchy, though archaic and complicated, is a very stable form of government that gives the people a lot of voice in the affairs of government - if they know how to take advantage of that.
On the other side of that coin, I'm sad that so often, the words that should communicate instead block the other party from being able to understand. That's what some say the Treaty was about in the first place - a bloodless war to plunder the indigenous peoples of New Zealand. I don't agree with that, but I can understand that point of view.
I'm thankful that I met Robyn (another erstwhile contributor to this blog) last year, a Maori activist who showed me what all the fuss was about. It makes a big difference to meet someone, share a meal with them and find out what a regular person they are. Much different to seeing marching protestors on TV.
I think about my own ancestors and their experiences with Maori. They came to this country as settlers with the New Zealand Company, but instead of the large, cleared land they expected, they found bush and hard terrain. Thankfully they formed good relations with Maori in the several places they lived, learned the language and customs, and lived peacefully side by side. At least that's how it comes across in their written accounts - which I realise may be euphemistic. Still, it's nice to think that while chiefs and governors were haggling, common folk such as my ancestors were simply getting on with the business of life, and looking not only to their own interests but the interests of their neighbours, brown or white. One part of me says that is incredibly naive, another part of me says, so what?